By notgoodenough - 25/11/2011 17:20 - United States

Spicy
Today, we were going around the table, telling everyone what we were thankful for. My girlfriend said she was thankful for her vibrator, because I can't please her like it can. My family thought this was funny. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 358
You deserved it 9 196

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unixdude 9

...and you are thankful for whores on Craigslist because you girlfriend is too much of a prude.

But it is funny!

Comments

But it is funny!

xosportsgirl14x 8

Seriously. And be happy that your girlfriend and family get along well enough to talk like that.

Tell them the joke: "what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've just told her twice." and then stare at her menacingly

You could go the abuse route. Or maybe just invite her to bring the dildo along next time the mood strikes. Everyone wins!

That's when you say you're thankful for you're other girlfriend who goes down on you without asking.

Who needs to ask for it?

G0v3nat0r 7

^^ agreed

n_epic_fail 14

And now you know what to get her for Christmas...

blackheart24 10

Tell her you're thankful for Palm-a-the Handerson ;)

Wow bitch I'd say go the dump her loser butt route

U should have just said "well I'm thankful for my left hand, it's always useful and handy (pun intended)"

So publicly embarassing someone about in front of theur family is hilarious now? He should make a cheese on the taco joke if she gets an infection. Then I guarantee it won't be funny.

It's not her fault he can't please her. It's his.

That does make for an awkward situation but at least you can take the initiative and find out how to properly please her.

so true

unixdude 9

...and you are thankful for whores on Craigslist because you girlfriend is too much of a prude.

Or even simpler: your left hand.

Maybe OP is just a lousy fucker. It IS possible you know,

Actually, the fact that OP's girlfriend told his entire family about her vibrator and lack-luster sex life indicates that she isn't a prude...

:) haha exactly!

I though I saw her there once

That is pretty funny

Exactly. Grow a sense of humour OP...

Blackmail111 9

Or a bigger penis

Xx_Dakota_xX 1

OP I would have gotten up and walked away

Capt_Oblivious 10

Hey, don't knock what she is thankful for. Maybe you'll make the list next year, start working harder at it.

bossroyd 4

Literally

SirObvious 1

Metaphorically

Capt_Oblivious 10

Figuratively. May as well cover all the bases there.

Tell her you're thankful for your inflatable woman. Ownd.

Be sure to add that at least the blow up girl can shut the fuck up and take it like a real woman.

ariannaa_fml 17

That's terrible, but funny!

That's pretty much the idea behind every post on the website.

Well, you can't move like that! Get a titanium piercing that vibrates. She'll get a kick out of that. Or just break up with her. She'll stil have her real boyfriend.

A Pegasister. Nice...

uprising_fml 0

start incorporating that vibrator into ya'lls sex life then . it's pretty common for couple to do so .

this is true. she'll be much more willing do anal if you let her tickle her clit with the vibrator at the same time.

juliajealousyy 1

Ouch! Sorry OP. but that is pretty funny (:

I like your boobs.

41, you are fucked up.

andzander 1

For liking boobs?

if he's no more than 16, then it ok.

G0v3nat0r 7

Yeah, what is wrong with liking boobs?

jsh95 0

It sure is funny, and he should learn how to work his wand, you have to learn before waving it around, she should at least tell him what he can do better

jsh95 0

Hell yeah it's funny, he should just learn how to use his wand, because he has no magic in it right now.

".. And I am thankful for her sister. Amen."

That would have been a good comeback.

haha:) nice one