Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML
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Top comments
By
Trivision
| 10
Well shit.
By
JustJumped
| 22
Surely someone had a tissue
COMMENTS
By
Amb3rDucki3
| 12
Worse things could have happened. That does suck tho, OP.
Reply
horne2
| 9
I can't think of too many things that could have been worse.
Reply
katykoolcat
| 13
Thats actually very lucky apparently. Hope you have a great life together.
Reply
happle
| 21
Why didn't she clean it up right away?
Reply
Jake_Hale
| 7
She could play it off saying "oh my fiancé didn't clean up his mess last night ;)"
Reply
punkyboy
| 11
I'm glad first comment isn't someone saying that must have been a shitty situation.
Reply
Sfaizi24
| 17
She could have been dumped.
Reply
Ins0mau
| 20
The Earth could have been blown up by intergalactic terrorist aliens.
Reply
threer
| 30
And of course #55 would be a guy. ;p
Reply
Miss_Latina
| 13
At least it wasn't on her lips or in her mouth then she wouldn't even get kissed
Reply
PinkieKeen
| 20
Why didn't you say anything, OP? ._.
Reply
missrebecca3
| 8
it's good luck for your marriage though, only positive I could think of
Reply
Kyp_kingofhearts
| 12
I agree with #128. Why didn't she just say something or clean it up. It's gross just to let shit sit in your cleavage for 30 freakin minutes.
Reply
cassie94_fml
| 20
Well, her grooms mates could've put viagra in his drink like another recent FML had
By
Trivision
| 10
Well shit.
Reply
horne2
| 9
Looks like op was in a pretty stinky situation
Reply
Jake_Hale
| 7
I know right? What a shitty situation.
Reply
punkyboy
| 11
57- wow you are the one millionth person on fml to use the shitty situation pun congratulations.
Reply
adamo_erebus
| 25
Looks like the OP had a shitty day.
Reply
rocker_chick105
| 31
64- you're not any better...
Reply
trollololulz
| 2
when will people learn the difference between a pun and a play on words?
Reply
PuggieKid
| 22
Never
Reply
BellaBelle_fml
| 23
#121 - Umm…isn't that exactly what a pun is, a play on words?
By
Crometer
| 23
That must've felt and smelled horrible, congrats on your marriage though :)
Reply
Damian95
| 16
It just seems like one tiny bump on a great road. It'll be a funny memory someday. Congratulations!
Reply
cosicosei
| 22
I've heard that if a bird poops on you it's good luck!!
By
beclaurela
| 17
I do think it could've been worse. At least it made for a speedy ceremony?
Reply
M3DIC4T3
| 29
The poop could have splattered all over her face, or down the front all over her dress, could have landed all over what I'm sure was her expensive hairstyle... The possibilities are endless.
Reply
CobraLazerFace
| 21
Or the bird itself could of flown between here cleavage.
By
JustJumped
| 22
Surely someone had a tissue
Reply
ohcheriecherie
| 20
one would think.
Reply
lexa1love
| 16
Seriously! The maid of honor or someone should has stepped over and did it quickly. I couldn't imagine just standing there with it.
Reply
MikeonFML
| 17
I can honestly say I would wipe this off immediately were I in this situation...it's 5 seconds of disruption for comfort the entire rest of the ceremony. Only if she was trying to hide it would I see this as a good decision.
Reply
Olympiakos10
| 15
Well it is white so it blends in with the dress.
Reply
MeowZebraMeow
| 7
I hope you left it. It could have been your "something new".
By
thatnucca
| 36
Liquid missiles at their finest...
Reply
Bano360
| 25
Must have been some shot eh?
By
phoneYuNOlisten
| 16
Too many negative votes, comment buried.
Show the comment
Reply
Narcoterrorist
| 6
This makes approximately zero fucking sense.
Reply
vipirius
| 18
I think 7 meant to say that she will get to have slutty marriage sex afterwards so not everything is bad. I'm only %69 sure though.
Reply
ryanthecheeseguy
| 18
How the hell did that relate to the FML?
Reply
Jezzikah
| 11
Maybe he meant like fecalfelia (sp?) Sex and bird poop combined? :p
Reply
lwonderful
| 11
This makes absolutely no fucking sense
Reply
illegalbeagle69
| 23
How can it be approximately and absolutely?
Reply
TecheyTim
| 14
I don't know where you come from...But here in the UK, shitting on someone's tits doesn't count a sex......
Just saying
Just saying
By
INDYSTRUCTABLE
| 43
I think people would have understood you taking a moment to wipe it off, so you could give your fiance all of your attention on such a special day
By
frustratedcelt
| 18
Think of it as a blessing, it is supposed to bring incredibly good luck!
By
noreallywhat
| 17
should have called a time out YDI
Reply
Trivision
| 10
I don't think there are "time-outs" in weddings...
Reply
Trivision
| 10
Sports? Maybe. Weddings? NO.
Reply
Trivision
| 10
Why yes, yes there is. :/
Reply
RedPillSucks
| 31
With weddings, you get to spike your balls afterwards.
Reply
jondivey
| 9
#26 Not if you drink powerthirst.