By nolove - 14/11/2012 10:36 - Australia

Spicy
Today, the love of my life, and long term partner, sat me down and told me that he feels so comfortable in our relationship that he no longer feels the need to have sex with me, and he doesn't think that that will ever change. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 447
You deserved it 3 642

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Tell him your so comfortable you don't need to bathe.

Friend zoned. Ouch :( Sorry OP

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Friend zoned. Ouch :( Sorry OP

That's not being friend zoned, they're currently in a relationship. OP's partner just doesn't want to have sex anymore.

If a guy doesn't want to have sex, he doesn't feel love. If he doesn't feel love it implies he just wants to be friends. Friend zone.

Sex does not equal love. The partner said he feels comfortable in the relationship, implying that he wants to stay together as a couple. Friend zone implies OP's partner only wants to be friends.

Romance doesn't always equal sex/eroticism...

If he were really comfortable he would want to have sex. And sex does = love, thus why it's called making love. You're an idiot who's probably never experienced either. Please withdraw your opinion as it is wrong.

Well if she is friend zoned then make it a friends with benefits, she can make hubby remember what he's missing out on? Walk around in sexy lingerie to set his mood perhaps?

And I didn't say romance, it is a long term relationship, never having sex is basically saying they want to be friends. It's understandable if they are just starting out, the romance is still fresh at that point but the OP said long term partner

Not everybody in the entire world shares the same stance on sex/love as you do, there are some people who would rather have love than sex, and vice versa.

No 11, sex does not equal love, however everyone has their needs... If he's not getting any from her/giving her any that means he's getting ass from someone else. Sorry to be so blunt but it's the truth.

Actually, sex DOES equal love.... If you're in a romantic relationship, doing sexual things brings you closer and forms a deeper bond - especially if neither of you have been with anyone else in that way.

I think you're missing my point. I'm not sayin sex is the only factor. Of course it's not, but without it, it's not a healthy relationship and he obviously doesn't want to have sex with her which means the attraction is gone and he wants to be Friends which is why he said he is comfortable with a sexless relationship ie: just friends

I'm out of this thread; it's just a helter-skelter of opinions portrayed as absolute truths! ciao-abunga

I totally agree, been there already unfortunately

I agree. Sex in a relationship is very important, and being in a long term relationship they have to keep the sex alive or they will end up as just friends. Simple.

One more thing though: Actrixx, do you kiss your friends, hold them and spend time intimately with them (not sexually I mean.) If so that's one hell of a friendship they're getting.

actrixx: Sex is a significant factor in a relationship, but it most certainly does not equal love. I doubt you've been in a significant relationship that's how you feel. Why do you think friends-with-benefits only is also known as 'fuck buddies'? If sex made you fall in love with someone by default, then prostitutes would be in a lot of committed relationships, eh?

You know OP can be male and his partner just doesn't wanna do anal cause it hurts? I don't know from experience. I'm just putting it out there since one of my friends said it does hurt.

Sex = love is the biggest load of crap I've ever heard. Sex = sex, it can be magnified when you are in love, but most definitely doesn't prove someone loves you. Like someone way up there said, it can create a bond, but just because you begin to care for someone you are intimate with still doesn't suggest love.

Atrixx - Sex doesn't equal love you moron. If you love someone it means you have something special for that person inside. Sex = Love? What are you smoking?

19-in a very friendly way, because I do agree with what you are saying, but sense we do not know the gender of OP and the way it is worded make it seem like a definite possibility this is a gay couple, so I don't know that op is a guy, just there is a chance and maybe give some advice for a him if you have any lol. I don't know any but, just wanted to say that.

You can have sex without love and you can have love without sex, but I think in a long term relationship you need to have both to make it work. If he says he loves her but refuses to have sex with her I would say he doesn't care about their relationship.

Sucks for OP. While yes, sex itself does not equal love, for most people it's a pretty important part of a relationship, unless there's health reasons why you shouldn't make love, I'd wonder WTF?

Yeah... A guy feeling "too comfortable to have sex." Riiiighhhhhhttt.

Of sex = love, then does that mean that abstinent people cannot receive love or give love? If sex is love than incest wouldn't be illegal, and best friends would have sex all the time.

I'm surprised that so many people are saying relationships without sex are unhealthy or that sex=love (well, not surprised, but it's still stupid.) Has anyone considered the possibility that OP's partner may be asexual? Maybe it's just me, but that was what I immediately thought...

oh that's terrible bc I have been in the friends zone fir the longest time and it's slowly getting more than friends!

Sex = love? Umexcusemeareyoujoking. Sex is sex. Sex =love is basically saying that relationships are a million of porn stories. Salute to you, sir!

Sex = love? Umexcusemeareyoujoking. Sex is sex. Sex =love is basically saying that relationships are a million of porn stories. Salute to you, sir!,

Sex = love? Umexcusemeareyoujoking. Sex is sex. Sex =love is basically saying that relationships are a million of porn stories. Salute to you, sir!,

I agree with almost all of what you've said here. You can have Love without Sex, as well as Sex without love. Despite the obvious importance of both of these in a partnership, I'm sure there's some people out there who make it work... BUT I sort of feel like we are all missing the point here, it's not about whether or not these people (or any other people for that matter) are going to be in a very happy (and I'm sure still somehow very stimulating )sexless partnership, but rather that the OP just found out that her partner is ending a part of their relationship that once existed, and how devastating that would be for her... But I have to say,the prostitute comment kind of just threw me for a loop. Just my opinion anyways..

*correction on my previous post, OP could be either gender. My apologies.

Who are the tards that keep thumbs upping your comments?

At least you understand. Some people are just so shallow they think a relationship needs sex, or that love without sex isn't real. Unfortunately, it's an opinion, and we can't change that. We can only hope they'll understand later.

Tell him your so comfortable you don't need to bathe.

"Some men just want to watch the world burn."

So now you have a new friend. Time to find a new love. Sorry. :(

Or keep the guy for all the relationship stuff, but go get yours elsewhere

OR! OR! OR! She can NOT break up with him and she can NOT sneak around behind his back like a whore. She can try to rekindle the spark of passion by some sexy lingerie. The flames of love must still be high if he's still with her, which proves he must love her, but he's gotten too "accustomed" to her "feel". It's time to kindle the dying ember of their sex life by changing things up a little.

(this comment is just going to be hatred) #57 you do not deserve to be in love, or a relationship of ANY sort. How can you suggest such a monstrous thing like that? You would suggest OP lead him on and just "have sex elsewhere"?

There are such things as open relationships.

81- if the partners are in agreement, that's their choice for an open relation. 'Getting yours elsewhere' implies cheating, behind his back, without his knowledge, etc. If you're in an open relationship, and everyone's fine with that, more power to you, but outright cheating is disgusting and has completely destroyed relationships. Its a matter of trust- screw sex- TRUST is the foundation for any loving (romantic or platonic) relationship.

How often do those work and stay healthy? That's literally just partners allowing eachother to cheat, and that's still wrong.

ouch! sorry OP. but maybe you should tell him sex helps express your love to him and is an important of the relationship to you

Maybe he is gay. Maybe he loves you but is not in love with you. Maybe he just isn't that into you...

I enjoy how you're assuming that OP is female.

94- Usually when people refer to their significant other as their "partner" it means they're gay/lesbian. I'm not saying it's true all the time, but most of the time it is.

That's rough; FYL, literally, OP.

I don't understand this, wouldn't being comfortable with your partner mean that you would want to have sex with them?

Normally, yes. But like another poster pointed out, it's very possible OP is gay and his partner finds sex uncomfortable.

I still don't forsee the relationship lasting much longer if this issue isn't addressed and fixed though. All romantic relationships require sex to stay healthy. I feel like this issue is going to rot it like a cancer. :(

Don't make generalizations. You don't need sex for a healthy relationship, especially in the case of asexuals and older people. Most prefer to have it, but if your relationships are based on sex, you're doing something wrong.

Sorry OP. Time to change your Facebook status to *available*

This is a brother-sister view he has with you now.. If sex plays a big role in a relationship for you, it's time to find another partner. he shouldn't have an issue with that since in theory you're friends now.

As a couple, you aren't forced to accept and do everything your husband says. Obviously, you two need to talk about this and discuss perhaps the specific reason(s) why he doesn't want to share this intimate part of a marriage with you anymore and what you guys can do to try to alleviate the problem. :) good luck.

Definitely not worth ending a marriage over, so ignore the insensitive people telling you that you need to move on as soon as there's a problem in the relationship instead of trying to fix it.

Or if they are a woman.

Is it even possible to feel that comfortable?