By Barrel - 05/02/2009 07:57 - United States

Spicy
Today, my wife left me the following voicemail: “Alex, last night was amazing. You took me to places I’ve never been to before. I can’t wait to see you tonight after work.” My name is Rob. We haven’t had sex in two years. FML
I agree, your life sucks 62 790
You deserved it 9 050
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

Dr_Phil 0

No sex in two years ... and you're still married, why?

224 11

Comments

Dr_Phil 0

No sex in two years ... and you're still married, why?

224 11
sheerem 7

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
16 46
sarah2144 14

It's not the most important part, but if you don't think sexual chemistry is important in a relationship, you're nuts.

83 4
TokioCore 17

Still #128 is right, its not THE most important thing. #1 made it sound as if theres nothing more to marriage than sex. Im not stubborn though, obviously OPs lack of intercourse meant something was wrong in his relationship. Let the thumbs down begin.

5 2
ARSCON 15

Because sex isn't a damn requirement.

1 3
Imdead 0

#5 is absolutely right. The writing was on the wall. I still feel for you, but dude get a clue..... and a hooker.

43 10
raidernation22 0

yeah srry to say id bet ya thatshed have a sex change for him lol

0 15
SoulFrog 7

I don't think you guys understand how this kind of thing works...

1 0
meganl_fml 0

why are you not having sex for 2 years?

42 1
AndreMAS 0

Find out who alex is, follow them. When they go to a resturant, call a hooker and take her there, get seated 2 tables behind them, get her to go under the table and blow you, as you come say, "Damn you alex" as soon as your wife looks, let the hooker out from under the table. Find a lawyer and divorce her ass

79 5
runmymouth 0

XD I vote for #14's option. That's hilarious.

1 4
reren 0

If you haven't had sex in two years don't you think that is kind of a sign that things weren't going right? This really sucks but it should have been foreseen. That does not mean that this is the end though. Talk to your wife. Cheating is a sign of a bad relationship. Fix the relationship and the problem will go away. May I suggest a marriage counselor and the seven principles of making marriage work by Gottman. Good luck and know that I feel your pain having been there myself. Best wishes.

21 7
lonkite101 14

No dip cheating is a sign of a bad relationship

9 4
kayykatastrophii 0

I'm sorry, that's horrible. You deserve better. :[ For some of those people saying it's "to be expected", did you EVER consider that they weren't having sex because SHE was the one not wanting it? Because, you know, she's cheating on him, so she doesn't "need" sex otherwise.

31 2