Today, my step-brother said to me, "If we weren't related I would fuck you so hard." Mom says I should "be grateful for such a nice compliment." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overheard my uncle talking about me to his friends. Nothing serious, just that he'd fuck me senseless if we weren't related. FML
Today, my stepbrother, with whom I’ve had a normal relationship with since we were 5, announced that he’s in love with me. I rejected him, but now my stepmom who’s Catholic is blaming me for "seduction and immorality" blah blah, while my dad now thinks my brother is a pervert who needs to live somewhere else. FML
Today, the guy I've secretly been in love with for years told me how hot my brother is. FML
Today, I went to a family reunion with my brother and my mother. She spent quite a while giving a glowing introduction for my brother to one of her cousins. Then, just before walking off, she jerked a thumb in my direction and said, "Oh, yeah, and that's his sister." FML
Today, I discovered that my stepbrother has been telling his friends that I'm his girlfriend. FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she looked up at me and said, "You look a lot like your brother." FML
Today, I got a text from my mom that said, "Your dad and I are so proud of you." Sweet, right? It was meant for my brother. FML
Today, I found out that I was adopted, now my gay brother thinks it's acceptable to tell me that he's always wanted to have sex with me. FML
Today, my brother had his fiancée over to meet the whole family. We were having a great time with her, and my mother gushed to her that she was like the daughter she never had. I'm her daughter. FML
Today, my family and I were visiting an aunt. While helping my aunt to set the table, my sister remarked that from behind I look exactly like her. I reflexively blurted out, "Well fuck you too." Very awkward silence. FML
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Top comments
tegraturbo2000 15
keep your door locked op
Welshite 40
Boundaries exist for a reason. You need to set both him and your mom straight.
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Comments (232)
LifelessStars 22
Well technically y'all not related if he's your step-brother, but that's still creepy.
_TheWoman_ 6
That's ****** up.
awkwarddebater 12
Pun intended?
AustinDenton 22
Haha!! At least you know with out a doubt that you're attractive. That's still totally creepy though especially if the parents okay with it. Still pretty funny though.
RonnieG 10
I don't know who's creepier, your brother for saying that, or your mom for not being outraged.
lsmith6150 18
At the high school I went to there was a pair of step siblings that everybody always thought acted a little to close, then after they graduated they got married. It was a little weird but legal, they never knew each other until they were in their mid teens and their parents just happened to marry.
kathryn14 19
This is pretty creepy seeing that I have two new step brothers as of yesterday
tfriedrich49 9
Judging by your looks, your step brothers may say the same thing
RedPillSucks 33
Is that why she's hiding under the furniture?
Wakachulak 22
53, that may have been meant as a joke, but it turned into an insult.
kathryn14 19
He was saying I look fuckable as well, lol..
RedPillSucks 33
@ kathryn14 you changed your profile pic. Now my comment looks weird, stalkerish.
kathryn14 19
Hahaha you're fine
Juneyah1017 9
Be afraid.
imbedderdenu 23
ummmm ew!
Barriaultcory 16
Then your step neither should be complimented by you're newly acquired restraining order :)
Wakachulak 22
Not sure how that's gonna work, living in the same house. Do not approach more than 10 feet unless in line for the bathroom?
jamnglamgirlie 17
I would be terrified. Especially if he finds out you're not related (by blood )
TaniasaysFMLL 15
I think he knows that they aren't blood related
Thors_Hammer9999 17
half siblings means that they share one same parent such as they both have the same biological father or mother, step siblings usually occur when Male A has one child and Female B has another and Male A marries Female B...they're otherwise unrelated children would become step siblings
KinkyCurly 13
I think the first comment is assuming the step brother is stupid (which he is for saying what he said). Anyway, that just by having someone else beside himself actually tell him "it's ok because you guys aren't blood related" he would start to pursue her.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
Why did you explain how half-siblings work to people who clearly already knew that information? The FML says step-brother not half brother so all that information is completely irrelevant. I am pretty sure that jamnglamgirlie was just pointing out that it is completely legal, and from a physical health stand point, fine to screw someone who doesn't have a blood tie to you. The Step-brother may not actually realize that part of things and may only be looking at the brother part of their title. I'm not saying the OP needs to screw her step-brother, just that I agree he could decide to try and make a pass at her one day because of not being related by blood.
Thors_Hammer9999 17
because before my comment there was another that has since been removed by moderators or deleted by the poster who tried to explain how technically step-siblings are half siblings and I was explaining it to him and not to anyone else really