Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had to take my son to the hospital for drinking sunscreen. Apparently, he saw something on the internet that said if he drank it, his body would sweat it out and continually apply it to his body. He's 16. FML
Today, my son thought it would be a great idea to spray a whole can of spray tan all over my freshly-painted white bathroom walls as an "experiment". He's 18. FML
Today, my teenage son tried to huff a can of spray paint. FML
Today, my 12-year-old son and 13-year-old daughter sprayed themselves with a ton of deodorant and perfume respectively. The two clouds of spray have combined into a noxious gas that slowly traveled through the house, giving everybody an instant, massive headache. Everybody, except my son and daughter. They think they smell great. FML
Today, I had to call poison control because my idiot son swallowed a bunch of baking soda to "make a volcano in his tummy." FML
Future Darwin Award
Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML
Today, as I was about to leave for work, my 16-year-old son stumbled home in nothing but his underwear and pink cowboy boots. He threw his hands in the air, yelled, "BOTTLE SIP BOTTLE GUZZLE," promptly threw up and passed out in it. FML
Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML
Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML
Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML
Top comments
Wreckless_fml 6
Sounds like a winner to me.
saIty 17
He probably saw the axe commercial. He wants the chicks all over his mouth.
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Comments (193)
BuzeeBee 0
You do realise that if he had sprayed it down his throat he would have died because of the nitrogen inside!! Ohhh.... I'm being a retarded nerd again.
GVirdi 11
Psssh maybe u don't know but that's how real G's do it.. Did u smell his breath in 30-45mins?
aroman2312 10
*plays claw game* cannot I got the retard!! should I put him back?? naw, lets go get some ice cream.
naughty_angel94 0
Boys will be stupid boys. Kinda funny...by brother would repeatedly light his arm on fire after spraying Axe on it. And my boyfriend would drink the breath freshener drops...it is apparently just mouthwash in small doses that devolve on ur tongue, but he drank the whole bottle ( it was small but still )
brycen24 0
Ftw
F_E_A_lifesucks 0
Ur son is stupid!
Gouryella 0
Does he want to die?
claudzzzz 5
what can you say,hes a 17 year old guy...
bill123nye456 0
Im sorry, your son is dumb as shit. I hope for our sake he got his iq from a dofferent parent.
samtron_ 1
-____- he was getting high!!!