Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw a brick down the laundry-chute. Guess who spent the night at the hospital. FML
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Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw my cat in the bathtub while I was in it. I had to go to the emergency room to get my penis stitched up. FML
Today, I was having lunch and I started throwing crumbs at my friend at the other table. Then I accidentally hit the kid next to him. He got really mad and came over and hit me in the shoulder with a brick. A brick. He just had a brick in his bag. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch with a cast on my broken ankle. My brother thought it would be funny to shoot my cast with a high-powered pellet gun. It went straight through the cast and now I need to go back to the hospital. FML
Today, while my roommate was taking a bath, I became horribly sick out of nowhere. Since the bathroom was occupied, I ended up having explosive diarrhea in an Amazon box in my bedroom, which I immediately ran out to the dumpster. FML
Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML
Today, while in the shower, my roomates thought it would be really funny if they threw my cat in with me. The doctor who gave me the stitches also thought so. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be hilarious if she pulled a prank on me, so she did the classic "bucket of water on a door" one. I ended up getting stitches and a concussion on my birthday. FML
Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML
Today, I came back from break to find that my roommate had been shitting in the bathtub for the entire 2 weeks I had been gone. FML
Today, I arrived in my dorm at 3 am to find my roommate passed out and a nauseating stench. While I was gone, he got drunk and puked all over the walls, carpet, and both beds. His inebriated attempt to clean up the mess consisted of smearing his vomit everywhere with my shower robe. FML
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Top comments
nikininja 4
What a total brick!? You chute kick him out.
bwinski 19
Who throws a brick down a laundry-chute? Hope you heal up OP!
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Comments (68)
KiddNYC1O 22
Mitt Romney?
outoftown 27
No, he uses a laundry elevator.
jonn090 13
It's all fun and games until someone get's hurt
TomPusslicker 21
...Then it becomes a sport....
Melphie_fml 9
Hang on a second...how did the brick incident happen "today" when you said you spent the night at the hospital because of it?
devious418 3
Sounds like somebody got bricked...!!!!
HighasaCloud 46
It better have been him in the hospital after you beat the shit out of him
EricaJoy 0
Why the hell were you down in the laundry chute?
UsagiArwen 23
You're joking, right? OP was at the bottom of the laundry chute, dealing with the laundry at the bottom of the laundry chute. Op's head was probably digging through the laundry by the opening of the laundry chute when the brick fell down the laundry chute.
alwayswinning123 7
Make sure to clean the brick later
pelicanecho 1
Who has a laundry shoot anymore?
whitenobody 10
When I was a kid I thought it was funny to call the downstairs siblings to the laundry chute and throw nerf balls at them, but c'mon, a brick?
oghater 0
All u were going to do was watch **** and play with your self what's the big deal