Today, my parents went out of town and I was home all alone. I put up party decorations such as streamers, balloons and confetti. Then, I drank out of red cups, crushed them up and put them all over the house. I didn't have a party, I just wanted to convince my family that I'm not a loser. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I had a bunch of parties while my parents were out of town. I made sure to clean up absolutely everything, I even vacuumed the stairs. As they pulled up, I noticed all of the trash bags filled with beer cans blocking their way into the garage. FML
Today, my parents came home after being out of town for the weekend. I stayed home, did homework and completely cleaned the house, thinking I could earn some brownie points with them. They saw how clean the house was and accused me of covering up a party. FML
Today, I found out that the day I moved out of my parents' house, they invited my whole family over and had a party to celebrate the fact that I was gone. FML
Today, my parents, who are out of town but driving back tomorrow, called to see how I was doing. They asked if I'd thrown a party in their absence, and I said no. My dad replied, "Well I'm currently looking at pictures on Facebook of our kitchen with beer and a bong on the table." FML
Today, my parents got back from their weekend ski trip. I had a few parties over the weekend and had cleaned up absolutely EVERYTHING; beer cans, throw up, spilled drinks, etc. The only thing I forgot about was the condom someone left in my parents bed. FML
Today, I got all dressed up for a New Year's party. When my parents and siblings left the house to their parties, I got undressed. I wasn't going to a party. I only got dressed up so my family would think I had plans. FML
Today, it was my 21st birthday and I invited a handful of my best friends over. They all stood me up and I drank alone in my apartment. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, I held a house party. For fun, I made sure all the beer was alcohol-free, so I could see which of my friends would be weak-minded enough to end up acting drunk. Three did. I was one of them. FML
Today, everyone at work was demanding I stage a party at my house. I agreed to it and rushed home to tidy up before the guests arrived. No one showed up. FML
Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML
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Top comments
JumbledGirl 2
Aww.... You forgot to break things...
natsaysheyyy 16
Uhhm... No one puts up party decorations for an actual party...
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Comments (190)
xIBleedPurplex16 0
Party decoration?...no...weed vodka yeah.
perdix 31
Your parents already know you are a loser! Why do you think they felt safe leaving you home alone? (Also, why didn't they take you on their trip? (Answer: you're a loser) ) Your choice of decorations shows that you are a loser. A non-loser party would have used condoms, panties, carpet stains and some vomit stench as the residue.
hellbilly205 17
Its gotta be the chatroom troll that has no life
THE_A_TEEN 28
^Except Mr. Troll is from Poland. This OP is from the U.S.
toxic0n 1
Wow this is actually quite sad if true. :( FYL
hellbilly205 17
Eh still it was worth a try but i got defeated on a reference from an earlier FML it happens
Torva_fml 16
You guys totally didn't get it.... He left the thread wide open for people to add on too... Aaaannndd...... Alcohol, lots, and lots of alcohol.
perdix 31
#51, Haha! The joke is on you, my mom doesn't even have a basement! I live in her backyard tool shed. Big difference, huh, wise guy?!?! And my dong is ordinary-sized ;)
hellbilly205 17
I was talking about about OP perdix lol not you
perdix 31
#137, oops, I misunderstood. Well, then, everyone can go back to believing my dong is enormous;)
hellbilly205 17
Its okay by the thumbs down on my original comment i would say you were not the only one who was confused. Lol and ofcourse you have a big dong well atleast that's uh what i've heard.
Fonze13 0
Why not just throw a real party it no that hard even if you are a loser I'm pretty sure people will come just invite the right people......
stepht91 0
Now you just need a tiger in the bathroom and a mike tyson tattoo on your face...they wont think your a loser then...
kalbrek009 20
You only proved one thing...you ARE indeed a loser, but ONLY because you (1):tried to fake a party & (2): you posted it here on FML for everyone reading it to KNOW you're a loser. Get a grip. Don't throw parties (real or fake) until you have your own place & are @ least 21...totally not cool to have an unauthorized party in your parent's house... (only losers do that anyway, they just don't realize that they are)
hellbilly205 17
That must have been some party...
metalflower01 7
I'm pretty sure the douche bags that are cool for having underage parties in high school are usually the losers instead of the people who keep to themselves or are nerdy. Most of the time the nerd ends up on top, while the cool kids end up alcoholics with minimum waged incomes. Be proud of it. Unless your family thinks you're a loser because you are a loner and can't pass remedial courses in school or you're 32 and living in their basement.
06dopey 8
YDI for having streamers, balloons, and confetti. how old are you? 7?
VeganVampyre 27
Hey, balloons and confetti are ******* awesome! Don't diss them.
ImDaBes 6
You went through all the setup (and I assume cleanup) that's the hardest part of throwing a party. You should have just thrown a real one instead. Instead you've confirmed here on FML that you are a loser.
3rdbass 9
This is like The Cat in the hat........except there's no cat.
fuckmebutdontfml 16
...And no hat?
3rdbass 9
The hat comes with the cat, clearly. No cat, no hat. If you would have read my post, you would have known that.
Snafuusmc 12
Hmm... Well usually when I'm home alone I walk around the house in my birthday suit dancing or whatever comes to mind. But I guess this beats me?
fuckmebutdontfml 16
Doesn't everybody do that?