Today, my parents went out of town and I was home all alone. I put up party decorations such as streamers, balloons and confetti. Then, I drank out of red cups, crushed them up and put them all over the house. I didn't have a party, I just wanted to convince my family that I'm not a loser. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I had a bunch of parties while my parents were out of town. I made sure to clean up absolutely everything, I even vacuumed the stairs. As they pulled up, I noticed all of the trash bags filled with beer cans blocking their way into the garage. FML
Today, my parents came home after being out of town for the weekend. I stayed home, did homework and completely cleaned the house, thinking I could earn some brownie points with them. They saw how clean the house was and accused me of covering up a party. FML
Today, I found out that the day I moved out of my parents' house, they invited my whole family over and had a party to celebrate the fact that I was gone. FML
Today, my parents, who are out of town but driving back tomorrow, called to see how I was doing. They asked if I'd thrown a party in their absence, and I said no. My dad replied, "Well I'm currently looking at pictures on Facebook of our kitchen with beer and a bong on the table." FML
Today, my parents got back from their weekend ski trip. I had a few parties over the weekend and had cleaned up absolutely EVERYTHING; beer cans, throw up, spilled drinks, etc. The only thing I forgot about was the condom someone left in my parents bed. FML
Today, I got all dressed up for a New Year's party. When my parents and siblings left the house to their parties, I got undressed. I wasn't going to a party. I only got dressed up so my family would think I had plans. FML
Today, it was my 21st birthday and I invited a handful of my best friends over. They all stood me up and I drank alone in my apartment. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, I held a house party. For fun, I made sure all the beer was alcohol-free, so I could see which of my friends would be weak-minded enough to end up acting drunk. Three did. I was one of them. FML
Today, everyone at work was demanding I stage a party at my house. I agreed to it and rushed home to tidy up before the guests arrived. No one showed up. FML
Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML
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Top comments
JumbledGirl 2
Aww.... You forgot to break things...
natsaysheyyy 16
Uhhm... No one puts up party decorations for an actual party...
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Comments (190)
Spectre529 12
Get out and socialize!! Be friendly!! I'm up for parties anytime =p
noni1292 1
Hey it cute
RussianFox 13
31- This isn't a dating site.
sematariux 7
Yeah op get ahold of this ***** here, you'll be a winner in no time even with STDs
Spectre529 12
**** you. All I said is I'm up for hanging out with people. Get your minds out of the gutters you 9 year olds
johnnyhaha 0
wanna socialize wit me??
FunSized88 10
Your life sucks
The_Hitdude 12
There's a button for that.
metalflower01 7
Or a trigger...
metalflower01 7
And that was a bad joke.
OBUDDAYJOELPUTTY 12
Too much effort, plus your parents probably won't think any better of you when they get home.
LSS_fml 18
All that effort for nothing? Use that energy for making friends instead (:
plaguer 26
Just because you don't throw or attend parties doesn't mean you're a loser.
bbodin33 7
But it does
berichsoon 11
Convince yourself that you are not a loser, nothing else would matter after that
fuckmebutdontfml 16
do you make house calls?
Ruffclue 9
Its about time you prove your parents wrong.
Climaxx 11
Just because you throw parties while you're home alone doesn't make you a badass. Just means you were raised better then that :L
Evie_fml 14
Omigod, why? Why would you do that? If your family think you're a loser, they aren't going to change their minds because of this. And really, if your own family thinks you're a loser, they aren't worth the time or effort it took to do this. Plus generally speaking the rule with secret parties is don't get caught!