Today, my mum decided to teach me a lesson about carelessly leaving my wallet about. She left it on the floor so our puppy could use it and its contents as a chew toy. I was almost impressed to discover that he can eat three £20 notes and still have room for debit cards. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, my mom’s rescue dog snarled at me in an especially nasty way when I passed his bed. Turns out he stole mom’s purse, opened the zipper, and was now lying in a cozy nest of paper money. He was not at all amused by us trying to steal his treasure back. FML
Today, I was pickpocketed. I didn't realize until I stopped to get breakfast. I went back home to see that my dog had taken my wallet and had ripped and torn it up. I was pickpocketed by my own dog. FML
Today, I received a $100 bill in the mail as a late graduation present. I placed it on the table so I could go to the bathroom. I come back to find the table empty and my $100 bill missing. The fan blew the money on the floor and my 8 week old puppy ate it. FML
Today, my mother asked me if she could borrow $200. Being the lovely daughter I am, I gave her my bank card to withdraw it herself. She gambled it away and maxed my bank account out. I had $1500 saved. FML
Today, I found a wallet on the sidewalk and spent an hour tracking down the owner. When I finally returned it, he opened it, counted the cash in front of me, and asked if I was sure there hadn't been more money in it. FML
Today, my mother informed me that she sold my dog to pay off some bills. FML
Today, I was cleaning my apartment when I found a €20 note underneath the sofa cushion. I was pretty happy until I remembered I'd lost €20 a few days earlier and spent an hour looking for it. I'd finally found my own money and felt lucky about it. FML
Today, I managed to get a €5 note tangled in the zip on my purse. I couldn't open it without ripping it to shreds. FML
Today, while I have never been able to say my dog ate my homework, I do get to call several people and tell them my dog ate my wallet. He even chewed up my driver's license. FML
Today, I lost my wallet while out shopping. Panicked, I retraced my steps and found it at a store, turned in by an employee. Grateful, I opened it to find a note that read, "We left the money but took one dollar for karma." I checked. They did actually take one dollar. FML
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Top comments
hedgerow 0
dude your dog could've been killed.
alkanechain 0
Your mom is an idiot. Whether or not you deserved losing your money, the puppy doesn't deserve having all those plastic shards tearing through his system.
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Comments (130)
perdix 31
You ought to teach your puppy to fetch using your mum's *****. With all the bite marks on it, it won't give your mum much pleasure at all. Just like your dad.
eatmexcupcakes 0
whao what a bitch srry. but even if u do leave ur wallet around carelessly she's the one tht put it on the floor it wouldn't have happened if she left it where it was
ImaginaryFoe 1
She left it on the floor, not put it on the floor. I took it as OP complaining because his mum didn't pick up his wallet after he'd carelessly left it there.
waywick 0
wow must suck to live at home w your parents and even still, your shit isn't safe. perhaps now a lesson teaching your mum that your shit isn't hers to teach lessons with?
fmylife245 0
give her purse to the dog and make sure he thinks its a toy
twilight_0118 0
ok I say YDI for always leaving your wallet out, but your mom shouldn't have taken such extreme measures and waste all that money just to teach you a lesson when it wouldn't have happened.. still, dont leave your wallet out. FYL.
Mx_Rider 6
YDI, dont leave your shit laying around, this wouldnt have happened.
Kylias 6
... LOL. :D
KurouTenshi 0
3 bank and that kind of dough, and you live with mum? YDI -_-'
imdeborah 0
LMFAO @ #39.
ImaginaryFoe 1
Agreed. I hope your pup is alright but YDI. This is a complete responsibility fail on your part. Keep your wallet where it belongs and keep a better eye on your pet. Fernando, there are always similar comments on FML. In this case, my first thought was almost exactly what idk posted.