Today, my mum decided to teach me a lesson about carelessly leaving my wallet about. She left it on the floor so our puppy could use it and its contents as a chew toy. I was almost impressed to discover that he can eat three £20 notes and still have room for debit cards. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, my mom’s rescue dog snarled at me in an especially nasty way when I passed his bed. Turns out he stole mom’s purse, opened the zipper, and was now lying in a cozy nest of paper money. He was not at all amused by us trying to steal his treasure back. FML
Today, I was pickpocketed. I didn't realize until I stopped to get breakfast. I went back home to see that my dog had taken my wallet and had ripped and torn it up. I was pickpocketed by my own dog. FML
Today, I received a $100 bill in the mail as a late graduation present. I placed it on the table so I could go to the bathroom. I come back to find the table empty and my $100 bill missing. The fan blew the money on the floor and my 8 week old puppy ate it. FML
Today, my mother asked me if she could borrow $200. Being the lovely daughter I am, I gave her my bank card to withdraw it herself. She gambled it away and maxed my bank account out. I had $1500 saved. FML
Today, I found a wallet on the sidewalk and spent an hour tracking down the owner. When I finally returned it, he opened it, counted the cash in front of me, and asked if I was sure there hadn't been more money in it. FML
Today, my mother informed me that she sold my dog to pay off some bills. FML
Today, I was cleaning my apartment when I found a €20 note underneath the sofa cushion. I was pretty happy until I remembered I'd lost €20 a few days earlier and spent an hour looking for it. I'd finally found my own money and felt lucky about it. FML
Today, I managed to get a €5 note tangled in the zip on my purse. I couldn't open it without ripping it to shreds. FML
Today, while I have never been able to say my dog ate my homework, I do get to call several people and tell them my dog ate my wallet. He even chewed up my driver's license. FML
Today, I lost my wallet while out shopping. Panicked, I retraced my steps and found it at a store, turned in by an employee. Grateful, I opened it to find a note that read, "We left the money but took one dollar for karma." I checked. They did actually take one dollar. FML
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Top comments
hedgerow 0
dude your dog could've been killed.
alkanechain 0
Your mom is an idiot. Whether or not you deserved losing your money, the puppy doesn't deserve having all those plastic shards tearing through his system.
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Comments (130)
alex105 0
sucks for u oh ydi for being a douch
yottskry 0
"douche" and I never understood how that stupid word caught on as an insult in America.
Tomaino 3
I agree with those that say your mom made a very bad decision, both for thinking that it was a good idea to cause you to lose your money, and for putting the poor little puppy through the agony it will be going through soon. In my opinion, you can leave your wallet where you want. It's YOUR wallet with your money and your cards. What she might consider "lying around" might be where you CHOOSE to keep it. My dad hates when I leave my shoes "all over the place" but I leave them in the hall outside my bedroom door because I know they'll continue to be there the next morning. Your mom seems like the type who would force their child to smoke ten cartons of cigarettes if she found them smoking one cigarette.
clockworklolita 3
Exactly! Who gets to choose where the 'proper place' for keeping one's wallet is? Surely so long as the OP knows where the wallet is, and it's not in anybody's way, who cares where he leaves it? Or is he supposed to keep it in his pocket all the time, even when walking around his house? OP, I know it must suck to lose your money (you can get new debit cards, after all), but it's your puppy I really feel sorry for here. I can't believe your mother would be such an enormous bitch that she would purposefully put your dog's health at risk just to teach you a 'lesson'.
ImaginaryFoe 1
If the puppy can get to the wallet, it is probably lying around. And when you are living with other people, especially in their house, you make compromises.
clockworklolita 3
The OP said that his mum was the one who put it on the floor for the puppy to get, not him.
onnielief 4
It's your parents house. Therefore they make the rules. If you want your own place to do as you please, move out.
Tomaino 3
#63, first of all, the OP said the MOM left the wallet on the floor so the puppy could get it, not the OP. Secondly, compromises are fine, but how much could a wallet possibly be getting in the way? Okay, so it's on the kitchen counter one day, bathroom drawer the next day, coffee table the next, on top of the TV...how are any of these hindering the mom's life so much that the OP deserves to pay a $60 fine, the inconvenience of having to replace all the plastic (including the debit cards and possibly ID or driver's license - had it been my wallet, he would have also eaten my Disneyland pass which is a $20 replacement fee, my medical card, another $20 fee, and an arcade card with enough points on it for 3 mp3 players) PLUS the cost of a new wallet?
PedoBearTrap 4
#122, the dog ate 60 pounds @ exchange rate of $1.60 per pound, thats almost $100.
Tomaino 3
Even WORSE. I can't imagine that the OP's wallet inconvenienced his mom so much that he deserved to lose that much money.
aeliz 0
At least you're upbeat and optimistic about it. I'd be impressed too. Maybe your puppy broke some records.
Gator3LS 0
Your mom has issues OP.
chrisback5 0
Your mother is a moron. Make her pay you back.
distantg 0
your moms a retard
idkweird 0
Yes. Obviously, I have echoed you because two words from each of our statements are the same.
Anonononomous 0
oh snap!
Domonator 16
Soon, your mom's wallet will "accidently" fall on the floor and become a chew-toy (after you remove some money to compensate for a new wallet and the cash).
EastonxStealth 0
tell that bitch you need your money on time