Miscellaneous: Today, my mom took a bright red sharpie and drew a red circle...

By Cassandra - 14/10/2011 00:10 - United States

Today, my mom took a bright red sharpie and drew a red circle just above my breasts. She said, "If I can see this, ever, your shirt is either too low cut or too see through and it will be thrown away." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 632

You deserved it 12 208

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Same thing different taste

By punaise ... - 05/12/2014 02:12 - France - Marchaux

Today, to avoid walking on a thumbtack that had fallen on the floor, my little sister took a red sharpie to the carpet and drew a circle around it, "so that way, everyone will see it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 766

You deserved it 3 081

Unnecessary

By Ava K - 01/10/2019 16:02 - United States - San Diego

Today, my mom and I were looking at dresses for me at the mall. The cashier pointed out a dress, and my mom said, "She's definitely not going to fit into that. She's too flat-chested." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 568

You deserved it 172

By Fatty - 06/03/2010 13:05 - United States

Today, my six year old daughter cut out the stomach area of four of my favorite shirts. When I asked her why she had done so she replied, "So that they fit your tummy better, Mommy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 170

You deserved it 6 206

Fashionista

By malicious_melons - 07/07/2013 23:41 - United States - Santa Paula

Today, my mother had a full-on hissy fit because of the clothes I was wearing. Not because she thought they were inappropriate, but because I was "stealing her look." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 227

You deserved it 3 529

By elmalo68 - 20/09/2009 01:22 - United States

Today, I must find a gentle way to tell my 71-year-old mother that she's too old to be wearing shirts that expose her belly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 258

You deserved it 3 188

By Anonymous - 29/07/2019 22:00 - United States

Today, I had a rubber band around my wrist for too long, and it ended up leaving faint red marks around my wrist. My mom saw them, thought they were scars, and is now convinced I'm a cutter, "like the ones I've seen on the news," and won't believe my story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 605

You deserved it 237

By HYRTE - 06/09/2017 04:30

Today, I returned a shirt for my mom. When the cashier asked why, I just said my mom didn't like the way it looked. After an awkward pause, I noticed the cashier was wearing the same shirt. She was not amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 027

You deserved it 367

By maturity - 08/04/2013 00:30 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 987

You deserved it 64 243

By flatchested Sam - 01/12/2013 00:16 - United States - Radcliff

Today, my mom said I should start wearing push up bras to make myself look better. I was wearing one when she said that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 813

You deserved it 3 945

Good job parenting

By yova - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked. This is how desperate she is for any excuse to yell at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 473

You deserved it 1 935

ollie179 21

Friday 14 October 2011 8:47

Why would you let her go near your breasts with a sharpie?

YakuzaxGeneralz 9

Friday 14 October 2011 8:49

How did you let her finish the entire circle? How did you not see her coming with a bright sharpie. Your mother must be a ninja.

Comments

born12l8 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 11:24

What a bitch, make it into a bullseye xD

FlyingLazerWALRU 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 12:32

Oh damn. She might pretend to see it and throw away all your sexy shirts. What a shame.

Haiana04 3

Saturday 15 October 2011 14:18

momma for the win! XD

nastyness 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 15:03

Aerosol hairspray removes sharpie...

sweetheartslim 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 16:34

My stepmother is just like that... What is it with some people?

caity878 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 18:23

Why did u just sit there while ur mom was drawing on ur boobs? I dont want ppl drawing on my boobs...-_-

alival 12

Saturday 15 October 2011 19:03

She just doesnt want u to dress like a silly lil ho!!!

joshua88wa 3

Saturday 15 October 2011 23:38

She is a crazy bitch

chronick89 5

Sunday 16 October 2011 1:40

Haha she's probably a young teen with huge knickers and her mom wants to protect her innocence or she's just a ****

haniam16 6

Sunday 16 October 2011 2:10

rub some hand sanitizer on it.

Keywords

Parents Public freakouts Education Love Mother in law Miscellaneous Argument AITA Insects Fear Health Cats Skincare Jealousy Coworkers Gross Work Dogs Animals Drugs Fire Awkward Money Scams Transportation Cars Bikes Scary Neighbours Sex

The Top

Today, I volunteered to babysit my niece. How hard can it be to entertain a toddler for a few hours? Turns out, very hard. Within minutes, she'd turned the living room into a war zone, with crayon graffiti and a trail of sticky handprints leading to who knows where. By the time her parents got back, I was ready to sign up for a lifetime supply of earplugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 354

Today, I woke up late. My grandparents had slept over the night before, but they usually leave early. I heard someone in the kitchen and, thinking it was my brother, I said, "Thank god, the geriatric crew is FINALLY gone." My grandma then responded, "No, we're not." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 495

You deserved it 74 248

The Top

Today, I attempted to ask a girl out by doing a flash mob and singing for her in the store where she works. Turns out, she suffers from anxiety and the overwhelming amount of attention caused a panic attack. No, I didn't get a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 345

You deserved it 22 298

Today, my son got in trouble at school. The kids had to solve a problem by determining whether it was better for "Edna" to repair or replace her AC unit. He said Edna is an "old person's name" and she was "probably going to die soon anyway", so she shouldn't do either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 075

You deserved it 3 940

Today, I was getting ready for school and stepped out on my porch to go wait for the bus. I literally said out loud, “Today is gonna be a good day.” I took one step and fell all the way down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 016

You deserved it 151

Today, my friends were all talking about the first time they bought condoms. I can still remember the first time I bought them; in fact they are unopened and expired in my bedside table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 691

You deserved it 6 379

Today, after my boyfriend told me I didn’t have to worry about the ex who kept commenting on his pictures, I saw him sexting her when I leaned forward to tell him something from the back of our friend's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 451

You deserved it 216

Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 497

You deserved it 4 570

Same thing different taste

Unnecessary

Fashionista

Good job parenting

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