Ohai
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my mom asked me for advice on how to give a good blow job. I'm a guy. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Noname
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my mom decided to give me relationship advice. She told me the key to a happy/successful relationship was "letting your man explore ALL your orifices." FML
butnotlikethat
Nanchang, China 🌶️ Spicy
Stop talking
Today, my grandma gave me a sex talk. Not the usual one, either. This one was about blowjobs. I had to sit politely as she explained it's something all women have to learn if they want a well-behaved husband, but that it's an "acquired taste." Gag me. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Janitoro
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Double-edged sword
Today, I was blessed with a girlfriend who loves giving blowjobs. And cursed with a girlfriend who is also somehow really bad at them. FML
Anonymous
Newberry, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML
ReallyMom
Shawano, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my mom tried giving me the sex talk. Her version of "the talk" consisted of making me watch videos of guys jacking off and reassuring me that "it's natural." FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my mom tried to give me advice on how to improve my looks. I scoffed at her but listened to her advice anyway. She ended her tirade with, "I just want you to get laid someday." FML
PlayTag
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend gave me a blow-up doll and told me to practice. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
John Coltrane
Today, I asked my girlfriend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said, "Was that good?" She was serious. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
In training
Today, my girlfriend loves giving blowjobs; the problem is she is very bad at them, refuses to admit she is bad at them, and cries and stops talking to me every time I try and tell her how to do it better. My knob is red and sore where she keeps catching it with her teeth. FML
Top comments
Timmytwofinger 0
what the **** is wrong with your mum?
ModernDreamer 0
man that sucks.... or should i say blows?
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Comments (74)
stlcards220 4
it kinda makes sense to me. ur mom sees u as the average male, and wants to know what a guy likes with BJs.
hilobude 0
exactly!
minax24 0
awkward...
swimmer1195 3
well she probably meant it like: what do guys like
varkey 7
yes, she probably meant it that way, which is why the fml was written. she's asking him, essentially, for methods on how to make his penis feel good, which is extremely awkward
Leftieswillrule 3
perhaps she though that because you clearly get so many you know what you like and what you don't like
scribbles7 0
your mom? awkward!!!
MatGag17895 11
Maybe an explanation could be that she wants to know which elements of a ******* actually makes it feel good.
annigotammo 1
you make it seem like the fact that your a guy is the fml not the fact that your MOM asked. cause if a girl friend had asked I don't think it would be THAT weird, at least not an fml.
bkb1886 0
Have her blow you and you can tell her what feels best
smhlqnick 0
Tell her that you're still a virgin and don't know. Then download the "Christian Side Hug" song and play it over and over until she takes the hint.
sovietkiwi 0
true . . .