I guess he slipped and fell single too.

Apparently dead, according to OPs username!

small accidents have large consequences.

i guess he ran into your knife 10 times (chicago)

clumsy dick

I don't really get why people downvoted that joke, #74, I thought it was pretty clever.

And her. (OP's "best friend")

Only concern is if she gets caught.

yeah it can be another "accident" ;)

He ran into my knife ten times.

He only has himself to blame

And the "best friend"

I guess you could say they broke up because of "artistic" differences.

I'm not, I'll be looking at the obits for the one that says "Slipped and fell into a knife... several times"

#34, I think you mean that he accidentally fell into the knife

he accidentally shot himself in the back somehow

some guys just can't hold their arsenic

So I took the shotgun off the wall And I fired two warning shots......into his head!

He had it coming

#115 I'm mildly concerned for you..

"Caaaarla. That kills people, Caaaaarla."

Deleted

Shoot. Shovel. Shut up. She needs to remember those.

That made me laugh.

Why? He deserves it

The reference you just did made my night.

"He accidentally shot his own dick off."

"Mildly" concerned. XD

A very clumsy one, apparently

you don't say

I slipped and stumbled down the stairs as she was bent over and we were both naked... No shit these kind of accidents aren't accidental.

You divorce a husband, not dump him. Unless it's his corpse.

And according to OP's username, he shall soon be nothing but a corpse.

so do jail.

#23: "so does* jail." Sorry, but improper grammar drives me insane. I hope OP divorced him and that OP dumps her best friend.

Accidents. Many kinds of accidents. I'm called an accident.

I hope OP throws him out on his ass and she never has to see his cheating face ever again. I don't hope they work it out even if she keeps him on a short leash, that's just not healthy for anyone.

They are married so I guess you have a point..cause marriage is you stick together for better or for worse.

Divorce sounds like a way better option....

Sure, 54, except that when they say "for better or for worse" I don't actually think they mean "if the dickhead cheats on you, forgive him because he's your husband." That whole "sticking together" thing works a lot better when one of them hasn't just completely and irreparably destroyed the trust and love in the relationship....

Not when he cheats, that's when death part them