Today, my insomnia got so bad that I became convinced my husband was having an affair in our bed right next to me. I punched him so hard in the shoulder that he awoke from a sound sleep, farted, and then shook it off and went back to sleep unfazed. I'm so jealous. FML
I agree, your life sucks 386
You deserved it 1 160

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That's a delusion. Your lack of sleep is causing psychosis--your brain is making up alternate realities. Please go to the ER and tell them this. You need a doctor.

You should have punched the whore he was sleeping with! The bitch didn't even have the decency to wait for you to go to sleep before boning your man in your bed. The nerve!!!!

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You should have punched the whore he was sleeping with! The bitch didn't even have the decency to wait for you to go to sleep before boning your man in your bed. The nerve!!!!

That's a delusion. Your lack of sleep is causing psychosis--your brain is making up alternate realities. Please go to the ER and tell them this. You need a doctor.

So, you were upset by something, and chose violence against your spouse? Kinda ratchet brah.

He was trying to get back to dreaming about having an affair, and left you a little present in the process...