Today, my husband ran at me, groaning like a zombie. I was so startled that I screamed, punched him, and started sobbing. Now he won't talk to me because this is 'the first step on the road of domestic violence'. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a heated argument. He raised his hand like he was going to hit me. Having been hit by my ex before, I panicked and instinctively kicked his legs out from under him. He then dumped me because he said he was just gonna scare me, but I used real violence on him. FML
Today, I received a call from my husband of 10 years from prison. He sobbed on the phone as he explained to me that his anger got the best of him, and couldn’t control himself. He beat the pulp out of a classmate of his for declining a date with him, and sent her to the hospital. FML
Today, my husband came home with tears in his eyes. I ran and asked him why he was crying. He said he wasn't, but he finally admitting to talking to a woman in a bar who, when she noticed his wedding ring, sprayed him with mace. FML
Today, my husband came home and groped my ass, so I tossed cold water into his face to make him back off. He's now acting like I sprayed him with toxic acid waste now. What a baby. FML
Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML
Today, my husband smacked me quite hard, and I have a black eye as a result. It's not a case of a domestic abuse, it was 100% unintended because he was sleeping and had a really bad dream that made him swing his arm. He's feeling bad about it, and I would laugh it off, but I have an important meeting tonight. FML
Today, I tried to talk to my soon-to-be-husband about how he needs to take a more active approach in his own life. It devolved to him screaming at me and putting words in my mouth. This has been going on for six months. FML
Today, my soon-to-be-ex husband threw an epic tantrum, with crying, snotty nose, throwing himself on the floor, grabbing me by my feet, begging me not to leave him, and that he’s “so sorry” after I confronted him about the sexts and nudes he’s been sending to another woman. FML
Today, there was a knock at my door, and I was greeted by a punch to the face. The man was the extremely angry "fiancé" of the girl I've been married to for just over a year. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Tempuser117 2
Rule #2 Double Tap. Might want to punch him again just in case.
redbluegreen 41
I have no idea on how to respong either.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (92)
mylifepwnz 0
You punched I'm the face? Yeah no shit he's possed
Aardvark_Embassy 0
Though that wasnt a very smart move on your husbands part to startle you so bad, I can tell you that you won't be surviving the Zombie Apocalypse.
ohhitsher 5
He needs to man up. It's not that serious.
rkdstp1995 25
I think you're my new favorite person, 26.
1freakbag 3
I do that to my sister. she screams as if she was going to die.
rhiley 26
ooooh
rhiley 26
fun marriage
rhiley 26
I would do the same tbh
lucasjames22 8
What the Hell is wrong with you? punching and sobbing?? get a grip
sharond23 10
over react much? you sound like a drama queen.