Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Nervous
Today, at work, we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
How d'you think?
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, my husband of 3 years learned that he's going to be a father. No, I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
News to me
Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife. FML
Today, I found out that my long-distance boyfriend just got married because his "real" girlfriend is pregnant. FML
Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm Dad." FML
Today, my fiance told me he thought it was time that we started to see other people. I'm six months pregnant with his baby. FML
Work husbands and work wives
Today, I went to my husband’s work party where employees could bring a plus one. There, I met the colleague he talks so much about. She looked noticeably disappointed and said to my husband, “Wife?! You told me you were single!” We’ve been married for 7 years. FML
Congrats!
Today, I found out my husband is having a baby. Too bad I'm not pregnant. FML
Top comments
SirCharles83 13
Is there any one left out there who isn't a scum bag? What ever happened to having values?
Freethaawave 19
OP is psychic.
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Comments (144)
IsRaeliPrinCess 8
I'm sorry that happened to you, but how the fxck did you guess something like that?
Zorrm 8
Well isn't that ironic. Certainly sucks though.
timtamslam 19
I agree, I hope you mean EX-husband now! Feeling for you, OP :(
1crabbygirl 10
Gosh I've been there. Be strong, Lady.
Twisted_Angel 17
Shit op... that's horrible. pack his Shit and tell him to go live with her.
whY402Jay 12
Time to leave.
spazz666 18
Yeah, punishment for adultery... Generally when you get a divorce due to the other partner cheating you can take EVERYTHING. I'd call that punishment enough.
skyeyez9 24
If you decided to stay married scenario: He begs you to forgive him and plead he will never do it again. Meanwhile, he will probably have visitation with the kid once its born and bring him/her over to your house and expect you to help feed, change diapers, and pretend everything is ok. And he will have contact with the other woman. Scenario 2: you get rid of the douchebag and not have to deal with a cheating husband, and his bastard child. Cause you know he will get all huffy when you resent the kid, and watch him interact with him/her. And expect you to not harbor any hurt feelings...and move on. And imagine all of that....if the child resembles the other woman. Imo, its easier to leave than to stay and watch him still interact with the other woman because they now have a child together. Because will you honestly be able to be happy with a cheating husband, his child he had with some *****? And Be able to keep a strong face while he brings the kid to your house?
Trish01 23
#93 - If your ex-husband was abusive and an adulterer, it doesn't sound very emotionally healthy on your part to leave him for another guy. You should've left him for your own good, in my opinion. Also, might've been a good option to stay single for a while afterwards. Just my thought.
gracehi 31
117, Not in "no fault" states, like Florida. My ex husband's abuse couldn't even be held against him in divorce court. And when it comes to finding someone new when you're in a bad relationship, it's not so much about punishment as it is a disregard for the person who abused you, and the result of unfulfilled needs. I think that if you treat your significant other like shit, you can't expect them to be dutiful.