Today, my girlfriend tried to cover my eyes while I was driving on the main street, all because she caught me looking at an ad featuring bikini-clad girls on the bus ahead of our car. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was cuddling my girlfriend. The TV was on behind me, with some kind of girl's basketball game playing. When I stared into my girlfriend's eyes, she accused me of trying to check out the girls by looking at their reflection in her eyes. FML
Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me on a drive while he did some errands. I waited for him in the car with my bare feet on his dashboard, like I usually do. As I waited, I noticed a woman blatantly taking pictures of my feet from across the lot, and she winked at me. I cowered in my seat until he came back. FML
Today, my husband managed to crash the car because he was too busy looking at an attractive girl with her leggings wedged up her ass crack, and I know he only crashed because he was looking at her, because I was in the car with him when it happened. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML
Today, I was driving to work, following my girlfriend's car. I looked down to change the radio station and felt a large bump. I rear-ended my girlfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend tried to look at my phone and I turned it away from her. Now she’s convinced I’m cheating on her. In reality, I’m too embarrassed to admit it’s because Facebook is showing me nonstop ads for laxatives after I ordered some two days ago. FML
Today, I saw a woman still texting on her phone as she started to drive away when the light turned green. I made sure to stare her down and give her a dirty look because she wasn't paying attention to driving. She laughed as I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML
Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML
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Top comments
borntoperform 14
I guess she didn't think that one through...
djwilson50 3
Sounds like shes feeling insecure!
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Comments (170)
dansco 25
Is the mad bitch trying to kill you both?! She seriously has issues :(
LoveBenLinus 3
This made me giggle a lot.
Chixken 6
Your girlfriend is stupid
blueeyedwolf 10
It doesn't matter where you get your appetite as long as you eat at home.. That sucks OP.
grands138 4
Dump her before you wake up to find your girlfriend standing over you with a knife in one hand and your penis in the other.
ohmandapants 17
She freaked over an ad? That is way too ******* insecure. She could have killed you. She probably will. I think you need to seriously re-evaluate this relationship OP. Weigh the pros and cons of being with her and decide whether to stay or go. I personally wouldn't be able to deal with that.
death_dolphin24 0
The grammar führer will be most unpleased!
ZDK5498 6
your GF is an idiot who needs to have common sense.... hopefully in the future she won't behave like a fool!
xXSleepXx 8
Cause you definitaly went out of your way to look at it
chels1994 11
It was the smart thing to do