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FMyLife
Anonymous United States

Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML

195

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

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Top comments

spidergirl41 0

Does she like carrots? Also, don't forget the ranch!!! xD

Dmaster22 0

your penis is orange? JK FYL

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Comments (195)

BioProject 0

What a bitch for giving you such an emasculating name. (1#, Buried! :B)

mandark 9

Sad face. D':

aback 5

Name her twat "the Lincoln Tunnel".

NobodyUKnow 0

Name it, The Grand Canyon and tell her everytime you have sex with her, it's like throwing a hot dog down a hall way.

FapFapFapFap 0

#15 is kind of my hero. Just a little bit.

lancerevo1994 0

I laughed my ass off at that comment!

alexgisforme3 0

lmfaooo haha.

f_me247 0

tell that bitch that her boobs look like tiny misquito bites, her ass looks like raisons, and her ****** looks like a seed.

ledandelion 0

How, in any way, shape, or form, could a ******-- an internal, tube-shaped structure-- look like a seed? And an ass looking like raisins is even pushing it. Maybe you should come up with some better insults; perhaps some that don't have to do with female features resembling components of trail mix? :]

jereinhorn 0

Well, a nasty, wrinkled ass could look like a raisin, but the seed part...I dunno...after an hour of contemplation I really don't have a clue

mcullen_unc 0

someone must be camping with no beer......sucks to be you....get out of the woods and maybe that stick will get out of your ass.... to the OP, im a chick with a car named "Matty" and a guitar named "Gabriel" and i so would never name my guy's dick, that's just evil.

davdude12 0

Ask her if her ****** will eat your carrot. And tell her carrots are good for your eyes.

Jakester 0

WIN!!

Jakester 0

WIN!!

meaganinja 12

Not revolting at all...

CyanideCandy 0

Haha sucks to be you!

mastory96 0

yea... those damn spray tans. :) I can't day YDI, cause nobody can help a small penis, but I won't say FYL, cause I'm sure your girlfriend is just playing. I mean, what is it with people? it's like the girl who was all "hurt" because her boyfriend jiggled her thighs. jesus. get over it. it just means they're comfortable enough around you to play around a joke about things.

DameGreyWulf 1

I like your comment. Really! They're playing! Isn't that what couples do? :c

jereinhorn 0

Well...maybe you should spend some more time around women...because NONE OF THEM ARE COMFORTABLE WHEN YOU TELL THEM THEY HAVE JELLO THIGHS!!!!!!!!!!

jereinhorn 0

Granted yes,,,most women are crazy. BUT..this poster didn't like his dick being called a baby carrot, just like most women would not well receive the complement of "Thunder Thighs". Use your damn brains!

DameGreyWulf 1

Now that I think about it, flaccid (uncircumcised) penises DO remind me of baby carrots....

jereinhorn 0

you have been either spending way to much time contemplating baby carrots, or have gazed longingly at a whole lot of uncircumcised dicks!

Puolukka 4

WTF? :P Uncircumcised penises look nothing like carrots...in Germany circumcising is not at all common unless you're Jewish or have a medical condition...so every guy I've ever been with except my husband, who's American, was uncircumcised...there's no resemblence to a carrot there... o.O" Or maybe y'all just have weird looking carrots in the US ;) j/k I think it's so funny what kind of discussions can come up on FML*lol*

xDreamerx 0

Hahaha. dude blame your parents for giving you a "baby carrot" FYL.

conan6 0

YDI for having a small orange penis.