By Anonymous - 20/11/2012 01:15 - United States
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True, we don't have all the details here, and exceptions abound, but it seems to me that in most cases, serious threats of physical violence -- especially with no explanations behind them -- are a perfect justification for terminating a relationship. Imagine this situation but with the genders reversed. I don't think you would be taking it so lightly.
Actually I would still think there is not enough info to justify a break up if the roles were reversed. I honestly could see plenty of people saying this as a joke. If a man would make that threat it's most likely not the first time violence has appeared in his deposition and would then would justify a break up. But off of one thing like that...guys don't go around making threats to women like that and mean them but only do it once ever.
Please note that I said "serious threats of physical violence" (as opposed to "comical threats of physical violence"), and that I allowed for other circumstances (e.g., was she high?). That said, the terse details provided by the OP imply that this was meant to be interpreted as a serious threat ("looked me straight in the eye", "I have no idea what she's talking about"), as opposed to an empty threat or a joke. I'm all for having a twisted sense of humor (I like to think that I possess one myself), but in order to make jokes like this to someone, you should be extremely confident that that person knows you well enough to at least suspect that it is a joke. I agree, it's naive to advise someone to dump their significant other based on a mere 234-character testimony and no context, but I (as a life-long serial monogamist, now happily married) think that most people don't see (and/or act upon) the warning signs of doomed relationships early enough, although they can seem like obvious red flags in hindsight. Serious threats of violence, even if empty or said in bluff (i.e., meant as emotional manipulation), qualify as such a red flag, IMHO. If the OP can't trust her with his sea turtles, he shouldn't trust her with his testicles.
92-so you agreed with me...thanks for the explination of why we both believe serious theats of violence are unhealthy and should be cause for immediate termination of a relationship. what you are not seeing though is you simply do not get that some people give themselves a chuckle by making them seriously think you are upset over something obnoxious. if you interprete it as a serious threat, it does not mean automatically that it was a serious threat. people can change the way they approach jokes to mess with a companion in a new, scary, funny way. you basically agreed with me then disagreed with me because you assumed conditions. it could be right for this relationship to end if it was a serious threat, but given that sea turtles were involved, it was probably a joke that went over OP's head.
Did she still have zombie makeup on since Halloween because I think she likes turtles.