PlayTag
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend gave me a blow-up doll and told me to practice. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
bootyislife
Lynnwood, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Hidden
Today, my girlfriend made me put a blanket over my head while giving me a blowjob because she didn't like the faces I was making. FML
Janitoro
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Double-edged sword
Today, I was blessed with a girlfriend who loves giving blowjobs. And cursed with a girlfriend who is also somehow really bad at them. FML
hitintheeye
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML
TeeJay
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, it was my birthday, and my wife gave me a sex toy for self-masturbation. She even showed me how to properly use it so I can masturbate myself. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend told me she wants to have sex with my ass. I'm not sure she's taking "no" for an answer, seeing as how she's keeping a dildo on her nightstand and is clearly waiting for me to fall asleep. FML
whattheheck
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
Winnipeg, Canada
You what?
Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Miscommunication
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML
ihatejasonderulo
Hounslow, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Careless Whisper
Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML
Anonymous
Fitzroy, Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Boomer humor
Today, I proudly informed my grandma that I now have a girlfriend. My grandpa overheard and said how surprising that was, given how expensive blowup dolls are. He and my grandma then both laughed out loud. FML
noname
France 🌶️ Spicy
Today, after having waited three long months, my shy girlfriend finally gave me a blowjob. Everything was going really well until I said, "Wow, you're really talented. Anyone would think you've been practicing your whole life." FML
Top comments
O_0 0
If i where you at this point i would practice...give her an amazing ****** and then stop having sex with her.
Dr_Phil 0
Dude you need to dump her. I'm picking up a ****-vibe from her. She's going to eventually cheat on you.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (48)
Giant_Midget101 2
Ouch.
eman1972 4
The next time you're making love to your girlfriend just stop right in the middle, pull out your blowup doll and screw it like you've never done before. Teach her a lesson.
LaSpiph 1
XD Do you like the feisty ones, OP? Maybe she's pissed because you're the only one coming during sex. If she's worth it, I would practice, but not on the blow up doll. Talk to her about what she likes and what you can do to make her feel good. It's harder for the woman to come during sex and not caring about her pleasure could make her feel used. I can't really say weather or not she's justified without knowing how you treat her, but I do know that being selfish in bed is a good way to end any relationship.
willliamfriend 18
Ouch
rorex 26
All these comments are ridiculous. Obviously he's not pleasing her. She's doing what she should. If she's not enjoying the sex then why keep doing it? I'd want to get off too.
Xandriajoy10 18
What a bitch! There are nicer ways to help your partner improve in bed. I'd tell her that you'll go find some one else to 'practice' with. She can enjoy a little solo time and see how she likes it!
Perry85 42
Hand her a ***** and tell her I'll practice if you do.