Today, my girlfriend decided that having OCD will help her lose weight. She is now convinced that walking in and out of doorways multiple times will burn fat. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my girlfriend always assures me she doesn’t care if I’m a little overweight, yet in the past few weeks she’s bought me running shorts, new trainers, a set of professional barbells and weights, a "how to lose weight in your living room" book and installed a treadmill in the garage. FML
Today, my mother offered to give my overweight girlfriend the workout DVDs that she no longer needs. FML
Today, I walked in on my mother-in-law teaching my 11 year-old daughter how to purge herself using a toothbrush. Her logic is that, “If she gets fat, she’ll never get a boyfriend.” She sees nothing wrong, and bitched at me for messing with her future. FML
Today, my daughter expressed wanting to lose weight so I took her to a licensed dietician nutritionist to get her a healthy eating plan, and even made her an appointment with a personal trainer to get her on track. I walked in on her eating a whole box of laxatives, because "this way is faster." FML
Today, I had to convince my girlfriend that, no matter how much she makes herself burp, she won't lose any weight. She still doesn't understand why. FML
Today, my flatmate has gotten so obese that she's breaking through the solid wood floors just by walking barefoot. She refuses to diet, and we're never getting our deposit back on this place. FML
Today, my mom once again commented on how I need to work out. It has come to the point that I now walk around in exercise clothes and have a bottle of water/fake sweat to put on, just so she thinks I work out. This is how lazy I am. FML
Today, my mother admitted to me that she sends me up and down the stairs to get things for her because she thinks I could use the exercise. FML
Today, I realized the only reason I chose to lose weight is that I can never cross the crosswalk fast enough. FML
Today, my girlfriend complained that she always feels like shit, and that she's tried "everything" to feel better. Everything except eating regular healthy meals, exercising, sleeping regularly, drinking water, showering, and changing clothes daily, that is. I pointed this out, and she kicked me out in a rage. FML
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Top comments
skittlesmeep 4
Tell her sex would burn more calories.
Barr3lR0ll 9
It will, but nowhere near the amount she wants.
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Comments (133)
bestnameright 14
I have OCD!!!!!!!!!... But I guess I'm not burning as many calories.... I just wash my hands ;(
MyssMarsh 11
Hahaaa, one of the most silliest things I've ever heard. Kinda cute though.
nina21194 12
Well... It could.... Walking alot
bjf10 22
No, you GET to have sex 12 times a day!
osm1989_fml 6
Wait, so does she actually have OCD or is this a newly developed self-diagnosis?
ambylyn2010 3
OCD sucks!!
Myo_fml 20
OCD must be terrifying. :( Especially if the thought is something along the lines of "if I don't step with my right foot a total of ten times more than the left, my grandpa will die."
Claire Raika Ahmed 14
It is terrifying. Especially when you accidentally give yourself impossible tasks and then become convinced your worst nightmares will come true and it’s all your fault
vampire1618 5
Technically, she's not wrong. However she's not as right as she seems to think she is either.
Fishfanatic 7
Well it will.. if she does it REALLY quickly and does it for several hours a day. Every day. And eats less.
SoultheWolf 19
Your girlfriend is a moron. You don't choose to have OCD, nor is it somethign ANYOE would want.