Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to an ewok from Star Wars. She says it's short, stubby, and fuzzy. Now she sings the Star Wars theme when we hang out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while having sex, my boyfriend started singing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that my vagina looks like Yoda. FML
Today, my boyfriend called my vagina "Chewbacca". FML
Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML
Today, my girlfriend called my flaccid penis her "little squishy" in a voice like Dory, and became upset when I got aroused because little squishy was gone. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML
Today, I found out that since I stopped shaving my legs, my boyfriend and his friends have started referring to me as a Wookiee. FML
Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML
Today, my date saw me naked, and was disgusted that 1. I shaved my pubes into a landing strip instead of completely bald, and 2. I missed a few hairs below my knee while shaving my legs. His actual words as he was half out the door were that he "wanted Princess Leia, not Chewbacca." FML
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Top comments
pdp_fml 21
Is she turned on by you when you have sex? I wouldn't worry about being short, if you can satisfy her in some other way.
Frelling 0
A chode in the hand is worth two in the bush.
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Comments (222)
EarAcheMyEYE10 2
Wow... where do I start... OP... that sucks but u have options... 1- Hand her some preperation H, and tell her despite saying that, you really like how she uses a hair curler on her pussy lips to give them that bubbly-swollen look that reminds you a bad case of hemorroids-herpes 2- Before u screw her for the last time, sing or hum "doin d'butt" during and after the deed, when she asks what that was all about, tell her that helps you think you're doin something tight for once!!! (this may be the last time so enjoy it!) 3- Trim that shit and surprise her with a threesome and tell her "that's what I like!!" 4- Tell her to FO in a terets syndrome kind of way!
LanaBabii252 0
LOL!!
taelorrae011 0
what a meanie!
joker1209 0
haha dude if she's makein fun of your dick that means she likes chicks
EarAcheMyEYE10 2
Ok, not to be totally mean... the last option available is too keep givin her the bone, as she must like it some, then look for a better girl (that doesn't try to rub that shit in your face every time!)
ijrnelson 0
take a hint and shave
kay2kay 1
Who cares as long as you're still gettin some haha
ydur 0
she's extremely insensitive and tackless. if she cared about u or ur feelings she would have said nothing. save yourself some time and dump her. "don't forget to say it's because her feet are too big"
Vaesive 0
Yls. Well at least shes ok with the little guy
RedPillSucks 33
She can't hum the star wars theme song if her mouth is full.