Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her...

By Walter - 24/10/2015 03:17 - Spain

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 112

You deserved it 6 244

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 902

You deserved it 6 672

The sensual world

By Anonymous - 22/10/2011 21:51 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were both at home, sick. We decided to make the best of it and spent the day in bed together. Things got a little steamy, and we started making out. As I started kissing her neck, I got nauseous. Before I could pull away, I threw up all over her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 425

You deserved it 18 100

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 774

You deserved it 280

By jimbop - 23/05/2009 17:48 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 890

You deserved it 10 314

By alf - 27/10/2008 02:34 - France

Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 880

You deserved it 7 257

By hamboneghost - 24/02/2015 19:02 - Canada - New Westminster

Today, I greeted my girlfriend with a spinning hug. She got motion sickness and threw up all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 307

You deserved it 8 857

Barf

By Danielle - 25/10/2020 11:02

Today, I threw up during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 190

You deserved it 188

Love hurts

By wray16 - 26/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 127

By sneezer - 30/12/2008 04:54 - France

Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 159

You deserved it 7 018

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 659

You deserved it 9 502

JeyBiscuit 14

Sunday 25 October 2015 0:29

What caused you to throw up? Was she not clean down there?

DarkJediLove 19

Sunday 25 October 2015 0:32

Prepare her an amazing bubble bath and pray she lets you kiss her again.

Comments

xxkrystalxx 14

Sunday 25 October 2015 5:21

That bad huh?

Quicky5_ 16

Sunday 25 October 2015 5:22

I am looking forward to a follow up.

Enzymatic 14

Sunday 25 October 2015 5:27

a unhygenic ****** is not good. explain to her its not her and make sure she has a shower.

allforfun 23

Sunday 25 October 2015 19:06

If she has an unhygienic ****** how is it not her?

Ame444 2

Sunday 25 October 2015 6:00

It's her that should write to FML , you sick ass

Tyrez 32

Sunday 25 October 2015 6:02

Yeah because he totally threw up on purpose and it had nothing to do with her poor genital hygiene.

taybabe121 10

Sunday 25 October 2015 6:32

She threw up or you?

StarkWolf_fml 23

Sunday 25 October 2015 6:59

was it because she has a penis?

sighlifeman 12

Sunday 25 October 2015 7:00

real men eat p*ssy, guess u aren't

sighlifeman 12

Sunday 25 October 2015 23:41

that's cause you're one a pussy

MissuhGrey 10

Sunday 25 October 2015 7:08

Did da pussy stank?

Uriel87 3

Sunday 25 October 2015 9:42

That is hilarious! ROFL

Mynamesjeff21 6

Sunday 25 October 2015 11:28

Guess you dont like fish then...

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The Top

Today, I threw an elaborate surprise birthday party for my boyfriend of four years. He thought we were going to a quiet dinner but when we arrived, thirty of his friends jumped out and surprised him. Instead of kissing me to thank me, he broke up with me because of how easily I had lied to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 720

You deserved it 4 756

Today, I've had a crush on a guy for a while - a friend of mine knows this. I finally decided to find out once and for all if there was any chance with him, so I drove to his house, armed with a home cooked meal and wine, only to find the very friend I confided in was at his house. It turns out they are now an item. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 162

You deserved it 152

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 55

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I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 452

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I agree, your life sucks 1 256

You deserved it 97

Today, my boyfriend and I attempted sexting for the first time. After about twenty minutes of Star Wars references, I gave up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 895

You deserved it 10 259

Today, I discovered the effect the cream has that my mom gave me. It was for my acne and it worked, in a way. Instead of having a lot of little pimples, I now just have a few gigantic ones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 186

You deserved it 814

Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask out my crush, only to find out that they're already in a committed relationship with my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 063

You deserved it 150