Today, I realized how exhausted I was when I mixed up my eye... - FML

By Anonymous - 16/04/2019 20:00

Today, I realized how exhausted I was when I mixed up my eye makeup remover with toner. My eye still burns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 643

You deserved it 390

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Same thing different taste

By Snow - 07/02/2009 20:43 - United States

Today, while I was trying to take off my eye make up, I accidentally used nail polish remover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 771

You deserved it 35 102

How? Why?

By WetMorning - 05/11/2022 17:00 - United States

Today, my day started with me peeing in my own face. My eye still burns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 672

Double trouble

By Anonymous - 11/08/2012 06:21 - United States - Yucaipa

Today, I accidentally sprayed some perfume in my eye. After rinsing said burning eye with water for a few minutes, I half-blindly grabbed the eyedrops my sister left on the counter and used some. They were actually tea tree oil drops. Ouch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 644

You deserved it 5 669

By Steve - 24/02/2011 19:32 - United States

Today, I put aftershave on my fingers to encourage myself to stop biting my nails. I absentmindedly rubbed my eye a few minutes later. It burnt like hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 678

You deserved it 36 219

By Bunni - 22/10/2009 22:22 - Australia

Today, I was tinting my own eyelashes when I missed my eyelashes and stabbed myself in the eye with the applicator loaded with dye. Now, I have beautiful lush black eyelashes, to match my half closed swollen red left eye. Sexy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 836

You deserved it 30 103

By donnap - 09/06/2012 05:54 - United States - North Highlands

Today, I got a really bad sunburn. On my eyelids. Who knew blinking could be so painful? FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 410

You deserved it 4 720

By Anonymous - 04/05/2011 18:05 - United States

Today, after an extremely hard day at work, I took a hot shower to wind down a little bit. I accidentally splashed a painful amount of hot water and shampoo in my eyes. My left contact is now stuck to my eyeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 195

You deserved it 8 972

By Anonymous - 28/12/2010 21:47 - United States

Today, my brother thought it would be hilarious to put vinegar in my contact solution. I took my contacts out hours ago and my eyes still burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 488

You deserved it 2 626

By allison_fishing - 25/10/2012 04:37 - United States

Today, I woke up with pink eye. My mom tried to help by putting drops in. It started burning like hell; she didn't understand why. It turns out she was putting ear drops in my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 299

You deserved it 1 836

Leave it to the pros

By Anonymous - 05/11/2021 00:01 - United States - Epsom

Today, I was attempting to tame my bushy eyebrows, since I'm starting a new job in a few days and need to look somewhat presentable, when I poked myself in the eye. Hard. I thought I’d blinded myself for a few moments. Now it’s just red, sore and watery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 238

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Top comments

QueenSaru 28

Tuesday 16 April 2019 22:53

What? No seriously, did you like... pour it IN your eye? I use toner on my eyelids/around my eyes and it's NEVER burned/hurt. Either you are using a shitty-ass toner, or... I don't know what the other options are, actually.

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 16 April 2019 20:16

Did you break open your printer for that?

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 16 April 2019 20:16

Did you break open your printer for that?

QueenSaru 28

Tuesday 16 April 2019 22:53

What? No seriously, did you like... pour it IN your eye? I use toner on my eyelids/around my eyes and it's NEVER burned/hurt. Either you are using a shitty-ass toner, or... I don't know what the other options are, actually.

Rosaluv 5

Saturday 20 April 2019 5:37

have you ever ..felt so dead that you mixed up your eyeliner and your eyebrow color? yeah. my redheaded self had fantastic Black eyebrows. smh

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Today, I woke up feeling awful, having caught the same illness my boyfriend had last night. When he was sick, I skipped my friend's baby shower to take care of him. Now that I'm sick, he goes to a friend's place, says to call if I need him, then turns his phone off. Seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 098

You deserved it 7 572

Today, my dad has been faking social anxiety to make me feel like there's something wrong with me. How do I know? Because I actually have social anxiety, and he not only shows no symptoms of it, but he also has a lot of misconceptions about it that he would know are false if he actually did have it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 180

The Top

Today, my pregnant wife suggested we have fun tonight since we haven't had sex in 3 months. She also said we'll be having waffles and sausage. I'm actually more excited about the food than the sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 655

You deserved it 2 765

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said that I tried to initiate sex too often, and that made me emasculating and unladylike. According to him, men should be the ones to initiate, and women should wait until the man does so. Sorry for wanting sex more than once every other month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 106

You deserved it 216

Today, my maid of honor, who offered to take care of my wedding dress before the D-Day, left it near her open window during heavy rain. My dress is now ruined, and she's backed out due to stress. I'm supposed to be getting married tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 219

You deserved it 3 749

Today, I smashed my finger with a hammer. A finger on the hand holding the hammer. FML

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You deserved it 309

Today, I politely asked my neighbor if she could tell her kids to be a little more quiet, and I guess I wasn't the first one to approach her. She slammed the door in my face, but not before screaming, "I bet none of you would be doing this if we were white." FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 99

Today, I was sword fighting in a play when I accidentally hit the other person in the head. He called me a bitch and stormed off stage, leaving me alone with an audience of 50. FML

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You deserved it 5 205