Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went skinny dipping with a few friends at my friend's house. It was really fun until one of my friends shrieked, saying there were bugs in the pool. Everyone jumped out and looked at her. Turns out the "bugs" she saw was my body hair. FML
Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML
Today, I thought I'd impress my friends with a backflip into the pool. I ended up smacking my back on the edge of the diving board and belly-flopping into the water. Now I have a bruise and a story that everyone is intent on retelling. I'm just glad no one was filming me. I hope. FML
Today, my brother flicked a huge bug onto my foot, making me freak out and fall into my outdoors pool. The water was so cold that I started hyperventilating. My brother left to "get help". I finally managed to get out, and found him watching TV. FML
Today, I work for the local fire department. I had a long call and I was hot and sweaty. I decided to skinny dip in my pool because it was still dark out. Everything went great untill my flood light went on and my dad ran out with a bat. I got smacked in the side with a baseball bat. FML
Today, we were hanging around the pool with a couple of friends and a crush of mine. Thinking I would be able to impress her with a well-performed dive off the diving board, I went up and attempted my best dive. I slipped as I jumped, hitting my head on the board. I had to be saved by the lifeguard. FML
Today, at the pool, I decided to face my fears and go off the high dive. I slipped off the edge and did a barrel roll into the pool while screaming like a little girl. FML
Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
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Top comments
laurenlovesjb 20
Why would you do that if there was a chance someone like her father would see you?
bobbington9298 10
So? Think about the dad! "Today, I was strolling through my backyard, when I heard my daughter and her friend in the pool. Thinking I could go say "hi" I went to go check on them. As soon as I stepped out of the bushes, my daughter's friend ran away screaming, naked, and slipped. Now I have to take her to the hospital. FML.
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Comments (107)
ConBroChilll 9
That must be somewhat awkward for your friend's dad.
CheeseHater 23
I wouldn't mind being the dad, unless you are underage.
ALlamaOnFire 20
.... Er okay. *Cough* Perv *Cough*
CheeseHater 23
How is that pervy? Because I wouldn't mind seeing a naked girl? I suppose having natural urges is kind of unnatural and pervy... wait... no.
Pleonasm 36
I think there's a time and a place for everything, and your child and their friend at your house while they are in the pool isn't the one...
CheeseHater 23
I said, unless you are underage, meaning that it wouldn't be a child in that scenario. Second, what is so harmful about my comment? He probably saw her by accident. I am slowly suspecting that there are a lot of moral crusaders in this place.
Pleonasm 36
I meant child in the sense offspring, not the young sense. Meaning I was trying to convey that it was not so appropriate for these urges to be over a situation involving your progeny and their friend skinny dipping while you watched. And yes, while the Dad WAS probably there by accident, your comment led to believe you'd like to be there voluntarily watching, regardless of the intention of your post, which is kind creepy when you consider the role the parent should have. I doubt moral crusading is the case since people get thumbed down for a lot less, and yours had bad connotations to begin with.
CheeseHater 23
Okay, sure. I don't want to get more into depth here, I'll just leave, instead.
CharresBarkrey 16
No, you just don't want to look like more of a creep, 40.
CheeseHater 23
No, I'm not ashamed to like women's bodies. If you are, that's a shame.
Shrike 24
So much for leaving.
Pleonasm 36
You just sound cheesy now, CheeseHater, and you're avoiding the issue completely.
CharresBarkrey 16
61 - Considering I'm a female myself, I don't think I have to worry about looking at women's bodies and being ashamed. We're not even saying you should be ashamed, we're saying you're creepy. Even if you DO want to see OP naked, why do you feel the need to tell all of FML about it? Why not just keep it to yourself? It's creepy.
misataylor86 10
Because they obviously are underage & also he saw his own child skinny dipping. Perv
AndOtherDrugs 5
I don't think what he said was creepy. I also think there would be less backlash if the genders were reversed.
gwendyblackdalia 2
AWKWARD!
Bazinga2010 5
I bet her Dad loves you now...
Pleonasm 36
"Oh, please don't kill me, Mr.Bush Stabber McStabby Stab, I'll do anything! *opens legs a little* "This ain't no porno you hussie! Now scream for me, while I gut you like a cornish pig!" *Stab stab stab scream staaaaaaaaaaaaaab* *Dramatic death with side boob* *OPs friend runs; goes for the attic* *Black crowd breaks fourth wall:* "Awww heeeeeeeeell no, don't you go in that attic! You gon' die, cracka!" All the makings for a cheesy horror hit
lambda_fml 40
So whats your favourate scary movie?
hateevryone 15
Awkward.....
ICastillo 25
Way to make your friends dad be a pervert, making him watch a girl run around naked and wet........umm I'm I have to go ill be back to finish this comment later.
ICastillo 25
...as I was saying earlier, why would you skinny dip while there is people around? You're lucky Quagmire wasn't around.
Spectre529 12
Houston, we have a problem
DocBastard 40
Right, because that's the normal thing to do after watching a scary movie: swim naked. I'm just imagining the pool scene from "Poltergeist". I didn't go in a pool for years after watching that.
VIPwhenever 15
Kinda irrelevant, but after watching it I was afraid of the shower pool anything that was a large amount of water same with jaws. Edit: sorry for my mistakes
Sputnikspak 13
I am not a horror movie fan, but my brother went through a phase in his teens. He forced me to watch 'Children of the Corn' - while we were at our cottage - there isn't really anywhere to go where you can't see/hear the television there... Except outside. And I'll let you guess what surrounded our cottage on the side that wasn't wooded.