Today, my five year old son decided to move all my stuffed animals I have around the house, into sex positions and massive orgies. What have I been teaching my son lately? FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old son apparently practicing his oral sex skills on the crotch of one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML
Today, I walked in on my teenage son passionately making out with one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML
Today, my husband and I caught our 12-year-old son "experimenting" with a 5-foot tall stuffed Mickey Mouse. He even made sure to rip Mickey's pants off. FML
Today, my 4-year-old son discovered that he really likes masturbating. So much in fact, that he took pictures of it with my phone. FML
Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML
Today, I found my 5-year-old son prancing around in high heels and cat ears, wearing a thong as a necklace, and waving a riding crop around like a sword. He'd found the box where granny keeps her special outfits that make granddad extra happy on Friday nights. FML
Today, the wife and I were in the middle of having sex. She was bent over and I was taking her to pound town. I look over to see my 3 year-old son standing in the doorway, humping air. FML
Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML
Today, I learned that my son goes on online chat rooms and has sexual fantasy role-play. To make matters worse, the characters he uses are from My Little Pony. FML
Today, I discovered that my 20-year-old son has been using my bras for his jerk-off sessions. FML
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Top comments
a_girl_i_know 0
today's kids know a lot more stuff now than when we were kids, I wouldn't be surprised if he learned it at school.
memo619 0
I think it was the fathers influence
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Comments (165)
StrangeCandy 0
Wow, seriously? So, if a 3 year old child asked me what my boobs were for and I told him the truth, that it's what's used to feed babies, you'd charge me with child abuse? Effing ridiculous. Glad I didn't tell anybody but my sister that her son was looking down my shirt when I picked him up at that age and asking me that.
Alexand3rS 0
a "few" years?
Kaneila0517 0
I think you're over thinking op. maybe your kids did put them in some weird positions but your imagination made it look sexual.
mktotigger 3
Social Services anyone?
ToxicMoo33 18
I agree.
NextBigThing5044 0
Kids know alot more then you think. He may not have gotten it from you, who knows. K
i_love_jb 0
LOL
vettle 6
kids are and have always been sexual it's just more acceptable now. if that had been done 50 years ago the kid would have been beaten.
MissFukMyLuck 0
when he's 8? can we get some hate on this creeper?
cudgel1023 0
Quit having orgies in front of him. Problem solved.
Kurry203 0
Your son is a furry