Today, my fiancée and I were selecting our wedding cake. The wedding is now off since I refused to buy her the "dream" wedding cake she wanted because it was chocolate. She called me childish and cheap. I'm highly allergic to chocolate. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend gave me a fancy chocolate candy and I got angry at him for forgetting that I'm allergic to chocolate and threw the candy into the garbage disposal. Turns out, he had spent a ton of money getting a chocolatier to put an engagement ring inside the candy that I just destroyed. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML
Today, my fiancée called off our wedding out of the blue. After a long discussion about it, it turns out that last week I voiced an opinion about the wedding she didn’t agree with, and doesn’t want to spend her life married to someone who’s going to argue with her every five minutes. FML
Today, I'm getting married. A few months ago, I allowed my mother in-law to take care of catering. She begged to be a part of the wedding, so I gave her the caterer's number and order info. It appears that I will not be eating at my own wedding because she decided to order food I'm allergic to. FML
Today, my fiancé informed me he didn't want a regular wedding cake, he wants a Batman cake. I have nothing against this, except that he already decided the wedding theme would be Star Wars. Essentially, I'm marrying a child. FML
Today, I decided to ask my girlfriend of 3 years to marry me. I made brownies with walnuts and put an engagement ring into the brownie I gave her. Not only did she choke on the ring, but on the way to the emergency room, I find out she is highly allergic to walnuts. FML
Today, my fiancée called off our wedding at the last moment, because her neurotic sister thinks she's "too fat" to be the maid of honor, and says she needs several months to lose weight. So that's a few thousand dollars wasted. My fiancée says I'm "overreacting" and that I "just don't get it". FML
Today, my fiancé actually threatened to leave me if I didn't find a "real" wedding dress. I love the one I picked out, it fits me perfectly, and was well below my budget. He's upset because it's technically a bridesmaid dress. FML
Today, my mother in-law made dessert. It was a beautiful chocolate cake, chocolate cookies, and every other thing had chocolate in it. I'm deathly allergic to chocolate and she knows this. FML
Today, I bought a personalized cookie cake with "Will you go out with me?" for the girl I've liked for five months. When I showed her, she said no, but took the cake with her anyway. FML
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Top comments
xMrAndyTranx 4
Her excuse to break it off, i bet she has a secret lover
sentient 10
you're better off
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Comments (189)
armystrongbaby 0
what? screw that...who's the immature one now haha
THeroinCZ 10
ALLERGIC TO CHOCOLATE?? Better off dead...
Clairebellee 6
She sounds like she's the childish one.
blakeford 5
What a bitch. Knows nothing about u. Get her pregnant and then divorce.
hannaaaahr 33
sounds like you got away right on time!
still_guns 16
Didn't you tell her?
Mabonga 12
buy her the cake and buy yourself beer
JudgeComrade 17
Find a better bride, then you can have your cake and eat it too.
SpamPam 18
I thought weddings had 2 cakes, one for groom and one for bride?
rocker_chick23 27
He is highly allergic to chocolate. If the bride ate chocolate and didn't make sure every bit of chocolate was out of her mouth before she kissed OP, OP would go into something called anaphylactic shock which causes the throat to close and die if not treated immediately.
fantasyworld 39
You dodged a bullet.