Today, my eleven year old daughter called me a moron, after I told her she was dead wrong when she claimed that rabbits lay eggs. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my seven year-old daughter called me a weirdo. When I yelled and grounded her, she cried and said she thought “weirdo” was a compliment. FML
Today, both of my daughters were having an argument because my youngest has decided that she doesn't want kids. I defended her decision and my oldest daughter told me to STFU and called me a hypocrite. I slapped her across the face for her disrespect and now she's threatening to press charges. FML
Today, after I warned my son repeatedly that if he wanted a rabbit he had to clean and feed it, I checked on it. It wasn’t just dead, it was dead and rotting in a pool of its own pee and faeces. I yelled at him, but he just shrugged and told me rabbits are boring and he forgot it was even there. FML
Today, my daughter is still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML
Today, my sister called me a moron after I told her that no, healthy foods do not give you "negative calories". She's 21 and goes around telling everyone that she's an expert nutritionist. FML
Today, my 4 year-old daughter thought it was funny that the chicken on her plate and chickens on farms are called the same name. I had my mouth full so I couldn’t stop my rotten eldest son from saying, “That’s because chicken is dead chickens.” Cue her crying while my son cackled like a sociopath. FML
Today, my 19 year-old brother called me a moron and told me to go read a book, after I corrected him when he said girls don't have colons. FML
Today, I was told that I was an idiot by a little girl because I didn't deliver a pizza to her house fast enough. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school. Apparently, she was learning about the food pyramid and when she was asked to identify what she had eaten the day before, she said "dog food". FML
Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML
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Top comments
s15c 9
Well, it's your job to raise her.
malikorslip 3
Which came first, the rabbit or the egg? ... Yeah that doesn't sound right
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Comments (197)
redbluegreen 41
There is still a large possibility that wouldn't teach her anything. Just because she'd know about menstrual cycles, they wouldn't cover other animals and it wouldn't tell her that rabbits don't lay eggs. Science class would have a higher chance of teaching her better, but even then, I doubt it would be specifically covered. She's eleven though so she still has a lot to learn. On the bright side, OP now knows his daughter doesn't give in to pressure even if it does come from an authority figure.
Sebastian_NG 17
I'm pretty sure that whatever comes out of those eggs is going to eat your rabbit
KrayKrayGurl117 7
Hey, in her defense... It's almost easter......
pubb 0
Would you rather tell her where baby rabbits ACTUALLY come from??
Dyer18 0
Tell em that they hump like hell
Bobissmall 13
At age 11 she should probably know. I'm pretty sure I would have known, at least.
Dracoboxer357 36
^ 28- Lol, actually, growing up, my dad didn't feel like trying to explain intercourse to my kid sister before she hit puberty, so he bought her a couple of rabbits and let her figure it out! ;) Of course, she ran to me to find out why the one rabbit was "viciously attacking" the other rabbit, again, and again, and again.... ;P
G0odgrief 0
good grief, unless they want grand babies in the next few years I hope they told her where babies come from before now.
omzz05 2
You have to be a moron
alan831 9
I would be completely fine with my daughter calling be a moron if I made a claim as stupid as the one she just did.
OfficeNinja 5
You can go ahead and spend her college savings on a vacation to France now. She will probably not need it.
drlove78843 6
Don't pay attention to her anymore when she say stuff like that. cut the conversation and move to smithing else. That will make Her stop being rude.
trendkilla254 4
this is why we do away with the public school system and enact a requirement to get a license to breed
t765234 10
1st section- What would that accomplish? 2nd section- I wish I could say I disagreed.
CEG3 0
Rabits do lay eggs -_-
gracehi 33
Please tell me you're joking o.0
Dracoboxer357 36
54- Resist the urge to take the bait on this one, I smell a troll. ;D
eddeeezzyy 19
57 - you are indeed correct, this guy is a troll because CEG3 is actually my friend's cousin's account, and he is actually known for trolling! :p so don't worry about it, he just likes to have fun in this unusual way lol
t765234 10
51- Did you that jumping off a cliff gives you the ability to fly? You should try it, I swear it works.
t765234 10
Know* that.