Today, my dad explained to me the "chain of command" for our house. McKinley, Mom, himself, Charlie, then me. McKinley is my two year old daughter and Charlie is the dog. He was dead serious. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I realised my dad speaks to me the same way he speaks to my dog when she's done something bad. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dad and my dog barking at each other, and my dad yelling, "I am the Alpha male!" FML
Today, I noticed that my dad scolds me in the same tone of voice that he uses to scold our two dogs. Gives a whole new meaning to being treated like a dog. FML
Today, I went on a run with the family dog. I returned home to three missed calls and a hysterical voicemail from my dad. Why? The dog was gone. Not me, his 15 year-old daughter, the dog. FML
Today, my dad called my by the family dog's name, and stared at me blankly as if struggling to remember my name when I was annoyed. FML
Today, my Dad told me that I was named after the dog he accidentally shot in the head as a teenager. FML
Today, my mom confessed to loving my "little sister" more than she loves me. My "little sister" is the family dog. FML
Today, I was awoken by a conversation my mom was having with my dog upstairs. She was telling my dog that a ghost lives in our house. She was completely serious. The ghost even has a name and a backstory. FML
Today, my husband informed me that his father adopted a dog. I replied "Cool," he then said, "She happens to have your name." I think my father in law is trying to send me a message. FML
Today, I was laying my head on my dad's dog when he walked in. I jokingly asked my dad, "I'm cuddling with your dog, are you jealous?" At that same moment, the dog lets a massive, earth-quaking fart loose, and my dad promptly responded, "Nope!" FML
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Top comments
rebbee 0
YDI for calling your child McKinley.
purplecowchik 5
YDI. Time to move out already!
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Comments (161)
salaamdelroba 0
Here's another "not an FML" due to the notorious ending of..."...and he/she was SERIOUS!" YDI for getting preggo in the first place, naming your offspring a dumb name like that AND for living with your parents.
truthinlies 1
good thing you don't have a cat otherwise everyone would be it's bitch
gigilvrs6 0
Well then at least…never mind
gabesama 0
YDI it for being a worthless teenager popping out yet another FAS baby with no father and not taking any responsibility for raising her (and for sticking a human being with a name I wouldn't give to a dog).
bankrupt 15
OK, I'm just going to tell this story because everyone is assuming the OP is a teen mother and while that is likely, it isn't the only scenario. OP's husband could be in the military and not able to live with her because he's stationed overseas. OR.... A gal I knew in high school got married, the couple bought their own house and had a little girl, all in that order. The husband was killed in a hit-and-run. The SOB who did it was never caught. The widow and her little girl moved in with her parents. She wasn't a teen *****; just a broke widow with a preschooler and a mortgage she couldn't pay off by herself. I would certainly hope that the OP's father wouldn't say something like this to her if she had been through something as tragic as this, but being a mother of a two-year-old and living with your parents doesn't always translate into teen ****. Sometimes there are circumstances that are beyond anyone's control.
Cinn_fml 23
I agree with your overall point, but please don't generalise and say everyone thinks she's an irresponsible teen mum when they don't. There are some people who've, like you, defended her and said it's possible she's not.
legitasaurusrex 0
you know... this could just be a bullshit story, cleverly designed to have fuckheads like yourself (bankrupt) to completely over analyze a damn FML! this could be a 90 year old man who finds joy in telling little lies, or a 12 year old girl who is very creative, the list just goes on and on and on. but obviously you know everything bankrupt so its only normal that i am completely wrong.
stevarino 2
It happens. My wife died when our son was very small. Didn't see that one coming. I couldn't do it all myself and moved back in with my parents until I could afford a place to live AND daycare. I am not the only person in the history of the world this happened to so I don't know why you would think bankrupt is making it up or is a 90-year-old man or a 12-year-old girl. It was just an example of how things could and do happen.
1kings67 0
dude you don't know her situation. maybe she is trying, at least she has parents who won't let her and her child be homeless and struggling in life. Her living situation is none of our business and who are you to judge I'm sure you're not perfect.
TheNewGuy03 29
i would name my daughter mckinley...if you smash me in the head a couple hundred times with a frying pan. however, i do have to mention that a great lot of people here love to jump to conclusions without thinking... |the kid|
kaayalbx 0
YDI for naming your kid McKinley ..
QWERTYCommander 5
You named your daughter McKinley? YDI. There was a girl that I went to kindergarten with named Hunter. Now, I don't feel so bad for her. McKinley sounds like a food they would serve at an Irish equivalent of Olive Garden and Taco Bell.
Mitteny 0
Interesting that noone has entertained the possibility that her parents live in HER house. I knew a single mother with a 3 year old who had her parents move in with her because she owned her own house and they wanted to be closer to their only grandson. She had no authority either.