Today, I realised my dad speaks to me the same way he speaks to my dog when she's done something bad. FML

Sigma

Today, I was woken up by my dad and my dog barking at each other, and my dad yelling, "I am the Alpha male!" FML

Today, I noticed that my dad scolds me in the same tone of voice that he uses to scold our two dogs. Gives a whole new meaning to being treated like a dog. FML

Today, I went on a run with the family dog. I returned home to three missed calls and a hysterical voicemail from my dad. Why? The dog was gone. Not me, his 15 year-old daughter, the dog. FML

Good boy

Today, my dad called my by the family dog's name, and stared at me blankly as if struggling to remember my name when I was annoyed. FML

Never forget

Today, my Dad told me that I was named after the dog he accidentally shot in the head as a teenager. FML

Today, my mom confessed to loving my "little sister" more than she loves me. My "little sister" is the family dog. FML

Alexa, play "Ghosts" by Japan

Today, I was awoken by a conversation my mom was having with my dog upstairs. She was telling my dog that a ghost lives in our house. She was completely serious. The ghost even has a name and a backstory. FML

Today, my husband informed me that his father adopted a dog. I replied "Cool," he then said, "She happens to have your name." I think my father in law is trying to send me a message. FML

Cheeky dog

Today, I was laying my head on my dad's dog when he walked in. I jokingly asked my dad, "I'm cuddling with your dog, are you jealous?" At that same moment, the dog lets a massive, earth-quaking fart loose, and my dad promptly responded, "Nope!" FML