Today, my dad explained to me the "chain of command" for our house. McKinley, Mom, himself, Charlie, then me. McKinley is my two year old daughter and Charlie is the dog. He was dead serious. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I realised my dad speaks to me the same way he speaks to my dog when she's done something bad. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dad and my dog barking at each other, and my dad yelling, "I am the Alpha male!" FML
Today, I noticed that my dad scolds me in the same tone of voice that he uses to scold our two dogs. Gives a whole new meaning to being treated like a dog. FML
Today, I went on a run with the family dog. I returned home to three missed calls and a hysterical voicemail from my dad. Why? The dog was gone. Not me, his 15 year-old daughter, the dog. FML
Today, my dad called my by the family dog's name, and stared at me blankly as if struggling to remember my name when I was annoyed. FML
Today, my Dad told me that I was named after the dog he accidentally shot in the head as a teenager. FML
Today, my mom confessed to loving my "little sister" more than she loves me. My "little sister" is the family dog. FML
Today, I was awoken by a conversation my mom was having with my dog upstairs. She was telling my dog that a ghost lives in our house. She was completely serious. The ghost even has a name and a backstory. FML
Today, my husband informed me that his father adopted a dog. I replied "Cool," he then said, "She happens to have your name." I think my father in law is trying to send me a message. FML
Today, I was laying my head on my dad's dog when he walked in. I jokingly asked my dad, "I'm cuddling with your dog, are you jealous?" At that same moment, the dog lets a massive, earth-quaking fart loose, and my dad promptly responded, "Nope!" FML
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Top comments
rebbee 0
YDI for calling your child McKinley.
purplecowchik 5
YDI. Time to move out already!
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Comments (161)
Acecool 2
Your parents are right. The baby needs the most attention, and will scream for it. The mom controls the zipper, thus controls the man The man then comes in And the dog does what hes told, and comes to them only when he needs required help to get outside etc... And then the hopefully by now pretty much self sufficient teenager or young adult!
nikalb3 0
he nailed that chain of command
QueenSaru 28
YDI for naming your kid ******* MCKINLEY.
youngbutwise15 5
I know a McKinley.....Road.
nataliex13 0
you deserve it for naming your daughter McKinley.
fyl7899 12
wtf kind of name is mckinley. that poor child
rasellersjr 0
Well, if you do something he disagrees with, just tell him the dog gave you the OK to do it.
icuddy69 0
Now Tell him your your chain of command- put him Last.
salaamdelroba 0
What #92 said
joolz_au 2
ydi for naming your kid that