Today, my boyfriend was making salsa and got jalepeno juice all over his mouth. A little bit later, he started going down me. He hadn't washed his mouth. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around in his car. I then decided I was going to give him a blowjob for the first time. As I was going down, he grabbed my chin and said, "Don't do that, your mouth isn't clean enough." FML
Today, after going down on my boyfriend, we were cuddling and I went to kiss him. Just before I could reach his lips, he ran his finger over my mouth and whispered, "S-s-s-semen." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. His partly digested nachos decided to make an appearance halfway through. FML
Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML
Today, as I hadn’t showered yet, I told my boyfriend not to go down on me in case it smelled "down there." We started kissing instead, but he made a "blech" face, then went down on me anyway. Apparently my morning breath was worse than unwashed crotch. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and we started to get a little kinky. He laid me down roughly on the bed, but I started to slide off, so I pulled myself up. In doing so, I managed to knee him in the nut-sack, causing him to puke. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a long blowjob and had to pause for a minute because my mouth became exceedingly dry. His solution? Spit directly in my mouth. FML
Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
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Top comments
hellokat1 0
Fire crotch!
Danniiboii22 0
nice way to "spice" up the sex lol :D
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Comments (84)
Melli17 3
want some fries with that?
LAXgurlie28 0
that's what they call a burning sensation
jltstephens 0
48 u should give me ur #
_krispy 0
her number is 48 idiot
WillKill4Beer 0
85 win! lmao!
Chinnithy 0
His junk would burn too. He likes it that way.
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Ew. Tell him to wash his face. You could get an infection.
Poetry 0
he thought he was having taco for dessert
KissinKitten 0
Did you see his insident prior to him lickin you?
strawberrycancer 0
omg- fyl!
19eightyeight 4
omg that is so hot.
Niaa_fml 0
I sort of think this isn't real. Jalapeno juice would burn your boyfriend's mouth, wouldn't it? I was just wondering, if it would burn his mouth, why did he not wash it off? Nobody likes the horrible burning sensation it gives and I'm sure that he would wash it off as soon as possible.
Niaa_fml 0
All I said was that Jalapeno juice would burn his mouth. And I get moderated for that? This comment is gonna get moderated too soon.
mightymart 5
wtf doesnt your bf have a minimum of hygiene?!!