Today, my boyfriend told me love is like a drug. I started tearing up because this is the most romantic he has been in a while. He then went on to break up with me, telling me that my "prescription is up". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend called and asked me why I love him. I told him because he's always there for me and continues to put up with my bipolar disorder. He promptly said "not anymore" and hung up. FML
It's not me, it's you
Today, after I tried to break up with my boyfriend, he said he won't give up on us and asked me to go to therapy. According to him, “You might need medication for how you feel.” FML
Money first
Today, my "boyfriend" told me that he loves money more than me and would date it if he could. FML
Today, my boyfriend said "You're a real work of art. You know, the abstract kind that no one likes. Anyway, we need to break up." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me, with complete confidence, that he's selected "drug dealer" as his career of choice. FML
I'm not worthy
Today, my boyfriend of three years who I helped through drug rehab and find employment in my office left me for someone else. His explanation was that now that his "head is not clouded with chemicals" and he "makes decent money", he wants to settle down with someone worthy of him. FML
Today, my boyfriend's proposal speech somehow ended with him breaking up with me. FML
Missing the point
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after 6 months because I told him I loved him. Not because he felt any different than I did, but because the term "love" should be reserved for God, and not be said to mortals. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied by telling me to fuck off. FML
Today, I realized that although I'm dating the most loveable, caring and genuine man, the fact that he's a crack addict means I'll never be his drug of choice when he needs a hit. FML
Top comments
Carbonation 0
The refills probably costed too much.
BeefyQueef 5
Ha that's a good one. I'll have to remember that
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Comments (121)
Track1991 0
Wooow, what a dick. Tell him thanks, because you are better off.
Jerret 6
If the most romantic thing he can think of is quoting Ke$ha, you can definitely find someone better than that.
Anthonyisnotshor_fml_fml 0
this made me laugh so hard fmls brought my day back:)
cupcaketime 2
You're gonna keep crying
haccobo 2
Hahaha that is clever.
lady_rapid10 0
Hes just a douche
Willelm 0
This was amazingly funny.
lrgenesis 19
Try to be more addictive so the next guy overdoses :)
lilbrah4real 0
What you look like
SammiiiiBoo 0
That's so slack :(