Today, my boyfriend picked me up from school. It was an unusually sweet gesture from him, and I was flattered. That is, until he told me to sit my ass in the back, so his dog could ride in front with him. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend and I were driving around town in his car. To my surprise he took me out to lunch. As we were leaving, a girl walks up and asks if he had room for one more for a ride, sadly he only has two seats in his car. Guess who had to walk! FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my roommate by picking her up from class with her dog. Her dog decided to surprise me by dumping a load on my passenger seat. FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML
Today, my boyfriend's car broke down on the way to the gym, so he called his dad to give us a ride. On the way, his dad talked about how much he hates me and our relationship, as if I wasn’t sitting in the back seat directly behind them. FML
Today, a guy I liked came to pick me up for our first date. As he opened the car door, I noticed nearly an inch of dog hair on every surface of the interior. Not wanting to get it all over me, I asked if we could take my car instead. He was so “insulted” he drove off and left me standing there. FML
Today, I awoke in bed with my boyfriend and his dog. After some pushing and prodding, I thought my boyfriend was trying to move the dog out of the way to cuddle with me. It turns out, he was moving the dog closer to him. My boyfriend would rather spoon with his dog than me. FML
Today, I pulled up next to my boyfriend at a stoplight. He was in the back of a police car. FML
Today, my friend and I offered a hot girl a lift home from campus. I was sitting in the passenger seat and she climbed in behind me. As I adjusted my seat forward to give her more leg room, my friend pulled off - slamming my seat back into her legs. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were driving back to college. He broke up with me 2 hours into the 3 hour drive. I had to sit in the car with him for the last hour. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were riding in the back seat of his mom’s car and she kept talking at him non-stop. He responded only in grunts. When at some point I informed her that her son had been asleep for several minutes, she just kept on talking to him anyway. FML
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Top comments
syki 22
Guess you're not his main bitch.
BubbleGrunge 18
Next time he ask for sex, tell him the dog is probably more than willing.
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Comments (133)
iAutumn179 12
Can't mess with mans best friend..
kenbarbz72 0
"Bitches play the back cause they know I'm the front man."
silverhelms 5
Must be a coon
Ibeatmyself 3
the back seat is safer than the front
zombiekitten87 12
I wouldn't have gotten in the car with him, then.
nickolascronk 3
Maybe a new boyfriend.
annalily5 28
Eh, I'd probably say something similar to any guy I was dating. Boy/girlfriends come and go, but your dog will always love you.
kittykat1818 6
Wow stop being so needy. Focus on the fact that he gave the sweet gesture! On the fact that he cared enough to come get u and all that! Who cares the dog sits in front? It's not like...his ex girlfriend. Get over it and focus on the sweet gesture.
katyamaslova 5
You realize that's an abusive relationship? Break up with him.
Nbrandwine 7
Mans best friend.