Today, my boyfriend got so baked, he thought I was in the washing machine. I came downstairs to find him sitting in a puddle of soaking wet clothes, crying about where I was. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML
Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML
Today, I passed out in the shower with my boyfriend. He just left me there. FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend wanted to be romantic by pouring a bath, getting in then calling me in. As I get comfortable, he stands up and gets out. At the same time, I notice yellow water. He'd pissed in the tub for a joke. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML
Today, after a short trip out of town, I came back late at night to the yard clean, the house swept and mopped, all the laundry done, and my son asleep. I was thrilled with my boyfriend, until I found him passed out, covered in spilled beer and piss. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend standing at the end of the bed staring at a large wet spot. Boy do I know how to pick 'em! FML
Today, at 2am, I heard a strange sound coming from the hallway. I walked over, only to discover my drunk boyfriend pissing in the closet. On my favorite shoes. FML
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
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Top comments
trulypar 34
How sweet, he tried to save you from drowning in the washer.
SkullsRules1 26
That would have been a great time to just start talking and let him think that you had dissolved into bubbles.
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Comments (86)
VowelMovement 15
What was your brother even smoking? Weed isn't supposed to do that.
sgdigaetano 3
Why on earth would you have (or want) a boyfriend that got so 'baked' he loses all reason? Ditch him, staying with someone like that is just asking for trouble.
imdaturtle 3
He was not high, he was drunk.
SUN_lover 19
Well, at least he cares. I have heard that people usually say the truth when they are high. Weird but you have got a caring boyfriend where as some of us are stuck with sober **** nuts.
Capnspark 3
that's actually pretty good in my opinion
justanotherbeing 14
at least you know he cares/loves you lol
AfroSamuraiHippy 10
either he was never smoked before and he tried a high dosage of high concentrated THC or he wasn't smoking weed.
BrandiCandi94 4
Sorry to break it to you, but he was much more than baked. Cannabis doesn't do that. If he wasn't drunk, he was definitely on drugs. Real drugs, not weed.
sleepybill 10
I want to get that high it sounds fun
maggeei 16
Don't
maggeei 16
Lol that's really funny