But… boobs

Today, my boyfriend has spent weeks trying to get me to cancel my breast reduction surgery, for selfish reasons obviously, even though he knows how bad my spinal problems are getting. I don’t want a hunched back in my thirties, but all he cares about is his sex life. FML

Nice guy

Today, I found out that I need a hysterectomy. When I told my boyfriend of 2 years, he broke up with me, because he didn't have time to "coddle my feelings". FML

Today, my fiancé told me that it would be okay with him if I got plastic surgery to make my boobs larger. It would also be okay with him if I didn't get the surgery, but he would call off our engagement and never talk to me again. FML

Feeders

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years dumped me, after he intentionally made me fat so that I wouldn't leave him. FML

Today, I proudly informed my boyfriend that I am now a size 4, down from an 18, after months of dieting and exercising after he told me he would like me to be a size 6. He broke up with me for "not listening to what he wanted" and "being an overachiever". FML

Today, my boyfriend decided he's asexual and dumped me on the spot. FML

Nice guy

Today, I was rushed to the emergency room in crippling pain, thanks to a very dangerous cluster of cysts on my ovaries that could rupture at any time. My boyfriend took this news as my way of denying him sex and broke up with me for "going to obscene lengths" to emasculate him. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted him to be a little more masculine and dominant in the bedroom. He broke up with me because I'm not "feminist enough". FML

Today, my boyfriend told me I was selfish for "choosing" to start my period on his day off from work. FML

Today, my doctor told me I should consider a breast reduction. I'm a man. FML