Today, my boyfriend and I went to a party. He got drunk and started talking about how his hot blonde girlfriend gives him great blowjobs. I'm a brunette. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was at this awesome party and I was dancing with this really attractive girl who started making out with me all of a sudden. Five minutes later, my friend told me that the girl had just given him a blowjob. FML
Today, I dyed my naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seeing me, my boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex, because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had a friend over. This friend was talking about how two girls were trying to get with him. My boyfriend said, "I wouldn't ever fuck the blonde one, but I would do the other one in a heartbeat." Then, realizing what he'd just said, he hesitantly added, "…if I was single." FML
Today, while at family dinner, my boyfriend got drunk and told my entire family the things I do in bed. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging about me to his friends, telling them I have a great smile, cute hair, and very perky tits. This wouldn't be so bad if we weren't both men. FML
Today, I went to a party and saw my current boyfriend making out with my ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I got talking to a really hot guy at a party. He told me that he was only here because he heard the host would sleep with anyone, and he and his buddies had a bet going. It was my party. FML
Today, I got drunk at a party at our house. At the end, my husband passed out, so his best friend and I carried him to bed. His best friend is stupidly hot and I get horny when I'm drunk, so on a whim I made a pass at him. He shut me down and later told my husband. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to taste some wine with some friends. I drank a little too much and referred to him as my brother to a random guy. Let’s just say I put a strain on my relationship. FML
Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML
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Top comments
NoahStaz 3
That's when you tell him that his brother or father is bigger.
AwkwardHaole808 16
Dump his ass and find someone better.
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Comments (167)
The_F3rris 11
Donkey punch him before you let him hit the road.
Anita1023632 3
Maybe I gotta give better ********...
cubanebgy 2
They say people that are drunk tell the truth about things they wouldn't normally say when they are sober sorry OP :/
annasher961 11
Truth comes out when your drunk
jem970 19
In my experience OP when your guy gets drunk around you and starts spouting crap like that, it is normally true. But you should sit down with him and make him tell the truth. Alcohol is an inhibitor, but before you kill/dump him, make sure he is cheating first.
JonahCullen 3
Well, he was drunk...
perdix 31
Buy a blonde wig and work at mastering your gag reflex ;)
Briiyahh 7
B R E A K U P
Yeliab333 20
Wow that's terrible
I_am_original 1
Probably want to make sure he is cheating first. My gf considers herself a brunette because of natrual hair color but the way she has her hair dyed/highlighted it comes out as a mostly blonde with light brown (dirty blonde) so I keep telling her I consider her more blonde than brunette.