Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blow job from me. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blowjob from me. FML
Today, my boyfriend sang "Happy birthday" to my vagina. It was my birthday last month and he forgot, but he remembers the date of the first time he went down on me. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of two years that he was my first kiss. His reply? I was the first person he ever whacked off to. FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. This is the moment he chooses to exclaim, "Wow, you really do have a lot of dandruff!" FML
Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend of almost 4 years completely forgot. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary. All I got was him stopping by for a quickie before he went into work. FML
Today, my boyfriend forgot our anniversary. But it's okay; I wasn't expecting anything after he forgot my birthday, Valentine's Day, and my name. FML
Today, I gave my virgin boyfriend his first ever blowjob. I was expecting we’d move on to full sex straight away, but he was weird about it. I asked what was wrong, and he was confused why men are obsessed with blowjobs, because the one I just gave wasn’t that good. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
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Top comments
mmedeiros14 0
well look on the bright side i bet it was a good bj for him to remember the aniversary
Mirorbo 27
*faceplam* Boys...please...for the sake of all us proper men...grow a brain and stop thinking with your junk!
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Comments (228)
nutbutter1 0
That must have blown her away
silver0jay 11
He probably said this as a hint for you to give him another one! What a dick!
PenguinToucher 0
Ewww your boyfriend wanted a BJ? every time he kisses you it's like kisses his own penis. How could he make you do that. *Loads shotgun* someones gonna get their ass blown off!
EmperorPsycho 0
CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, C'MON! I like writing in all caps
jummpy117 0
You have him a ******* after a month of being together?!?!?!?
Shamandalie89 32
And what if she did? Nothing wrong with that.
Erindub 0
Well you gotta start somewhere right?
tans_fml 0
I don't think the problem here is his memory, the problem here is that either you deprive him so much that he remembers one lousy ******* OR that you give amazing head & can't take a compliment.
Calyspe 0
hahahah
EvilPotato 15
6 it would be pretty hard to bit a dick off
CheapGodiva 0
Stop complaining about how he treats you and find someone to treat you better. Break up.