Sex, Anniversary and Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not...

By blower - 11/04/2011 04:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blow job from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 878

You deserved it 9 311

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Same thing different taste

Our anniversary

By Anonymous - 27/12/2019 20:00

Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blowjob from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 521

You deserved it 514

Dates that matter

By mee - 19/02/2012 11:37 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend sang "Happy birthday" to my vagina. It was my birthday last month and he forgot, but he remembers the date of the first time he went down on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 922

You deserved it 4 670

New Romantics

By sallyfradoodle - 13/03/2020 21:00

Today, I told my boyfriend of two years that he was my first kiss. His reply? I was the first person he ever whacked off to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 617

You deserved it 449

By snortingspunk - 03/12/2015 12:52 - South Africa

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 495

You deserved it 4 154

Bad timing

By Proprepourtant - 16/04/2011 11:28 - France

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. This is the moment he chooses to exclaim, "Wow, you really do have a lot of dandruff!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 971

You deserved it 12 581

Thanks, babe

By Anonymous - 14/12/2020 17:58 - Canada - Moncton

Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend of almost 4 years completely forgot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 971

You deserved it 124

By Disappointed - 30/05/2015 20:05 - United States - Lexington

Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary. All I got was him stopping by for a quickie before he went into work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 633

You deserved it 4 513

By Forgotten - 09/08/2010 14:38 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend forgot our anniversary. But it's okay; I wasn't expecting anything after he forgot my birthday, Valentine's Day, and my name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 261

You deserved it 28 641

Poor perfomance

By Anonymous - 04/08/2022 04:00

Today, I gave my virgin boyfriend his first ever blowjob. I was expecting we’d move on to full sex straight away, but he was weird about it. I asked what was wrong, and he was confused why men are obsessed with blowjobs, because the one I just gave wasn’t that good. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 115

You deserved it 647

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 021

You deserved it 14 604

mmedeiros14 0

Monday 11 April 2011 11:59

well look on the bright side i bet it was a good bj for him to remember the aniversary

Mirorbo 26

Monday 11 April 2011 12:34

*faceplam* Boys...please...for the sake of all us proper men...grow a brain and stop thinking with your junk!

Comments

MileyCyrusIsHot 5

Tuesday 12 April 2011 2:44

blow him on your anniversary. problem solved.

MileyCyrusIsHot 5

Tuesday 12 April 2011 2:45

wanna give ME something to remember?

legitlucas 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 3:03

yeah just chill

Sleventeen 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 3:26

you made him wait a month for a ********??!!!

evperry 2

Tuesday 12 April 2011 4:04

what did you expect?

evperry 2

Tuesday 12 April 2011 4:09

mofucka

colin5 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 4:11

blow jobs are amazing girls need to relize how good they feel so give them more often ahhahh

you_guys_r_fails 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 4:22

what's ur number again lol

xDancer101x 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 4:24

I love that OP'S name is "blower" cracks me up...

bmanholmes 3

Tuesday 12 April 2011 4:28

lol your life sucks get it XD

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The Top

Today, my relatives told me that when I stay at their house for the holidays, I'm no longer allowed to be out past 10 because somebody drugged my drink once. I'm a 25 year old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 400

You deserved it 1 845

Today, I went to my new gynecologist. He has an eye twitch, and every time he asks about my genitals, he winks at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 046

You deserved it 4 344

Today, feeling very distant from my daughter recently, I decided to sneak a peek in her diary to see what was on her mind. The book was apparently one of those that play the sound of a woman screaming when opened improperly, and alerted everyone in the house to my actions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 792

You deserved it 62 365

Today, at work, there was some teenage hoodlums outside in our parking lot. When I tell them to leave, one of the bigger guys steps up and says "I'll kick your ass!". I yell "No balls!", to the teen. He then whips me to the ground and sits on my face, proving to me that he did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 649

You deserved it 51 854

Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand just as the priest asked us to stand and greet our neighbors with a handshake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 678

You deserved it 2 169

Today, I found an eviction notice at the apartment my boyfriend and I share. I always give him my share of the rent, and he pays it. Or so I thought. He’s been using our rent money to shower his side chick with gifts and expensive dinners. The worst part? The girl is my 18 year-old sister. He’s 34. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 665

You deserved it 156