Today, I gave my virgin boyfriend his first ever blowjob. I was expecting we’d move on to full sex straight away, but he was weird about it. I asked what was wrong, and he was confused why men are obsessed with blowjobs, because the one I just gave wasn’t that good. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I finally felt ready to give my boyfriend a blowjob. Barely 20 seconds in, he said: "I'll be honest, this is TERRIBLE." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited, and in the end the only thing that blew up was him, saying, "Oh my god, just stop it already." FML
Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML
Today, having regularly given my husband blowjobs, I suggested, mid-session, that he could maybe reciprocate. He complained that I was wet, begrudgingly licked for about a minute and then gave up. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. I went slowly to build up the excitement, and I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." and told me to stop embarrassing him. FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. Apparently, I was so bad at it that he eventually just slapped my hand away and angrily said he'd do it himself. FML
Today, was the first time giving head to my boyfriend. He couldn't finish, so I tried a handjob. In the end he kind of pushed my hand away so he could finish himself off. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
How would he know? If his inaugural ******* was disappointing, you need to up your oral game.
SirEnigM0nk 22
Don't let this discourage you or him. Fellatio is an art learned with time. Once you got it licked, you'll both be set.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (7)
RichardPencil 32
How would he know? If his inaugural ******* was disappointing, you need to up your oral game.
SirEnigM0nk 22
I guess it...sucked?
Grizz8831 14
just not that well.
SirEnigM0nk 22
Don't let this discourage you or him. Fellatio is an art learned with time. Once you got it licked, you'll both be set.
guruza 6
Give it time...
D J's MOM 17
he's either an asshole to hurt your feelings, or he's not a virgin.
Ubehage 32
The first ******* was disappointing for me too. He was a dick, literally, to hurt your feelings that way. But maybe he was just being awkward, with no ill-intentions.
Nix188 13
it takes experience for it to be good. you gotta tell him to tell you how he wants it. eventually it'll be all he thinks about, give it time
timinator5000 28
My guess is he was so self conscious and was in his own head that he couldn't get to the point where he enjoyed it. Hopefully in time if you do different things he can tell you what really gets him going.