Sex, Anniversary and Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not...

By blower - 11/04/2011 04:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blow job from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 878

You deserved it 9 311

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Our anniversary

By Anonymous - 27/12/2019 20:00

Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blowjob from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 521

You deserved it 514

Dates that matter

By mee - 19/02/2012 11:37 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend sang "Happy birthday" to my vagina. It was my birthday last month and he forgot, but he remembers the date of the first time he went down on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 922

You deserved it 4 670

New Romantics

By sallyfradoodle - 13/03/2020 21:00

Today, I told my boyfriend of two years that he was my first kiss. His reply? I was the first person he ever whacked off to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 617

You deserved it 449

By snortingspunk - 03/12/2015 12:52 - South Africa

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 495

You deserved it 4 154

Bad timing

By Proprepourtant - 16/04/2011 11:28 - France

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. This is the moment he chooses to exclaim, "Wow, you really do have a lot of dandruff!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 971

You deserved it 12 581

Thanks, babe

By Anonymous - 14/12/2020 17:58 - Canada - Moncton

Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend of almost 4 years completely forgot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 971

You deserved it 124

By Disappointed - 30/05/2015 20:05 - United States - Lexington

Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary. All I got was him stopping by for a quickie before he went into work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 633

You deserved it 4 513

By Forgotten - 09/08/2010 14:38 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend forgot our anniversary. But it's okay; I wasn't expecting anything after he forgot my birthday, Valentine's Day, and my name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 261

You deserved it 28 641

Poor perfomance

By Anonymous - 04/08/2022 04:00

Today, I gave my virgin boyfriend his first ever blowjob. I was expecting we’d move on to full sex straight away, but he was weird about it. I asked what was wrong, and he was confused why men are obsessed with blowjobs, because the one I just gave wasn’t that good. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 115

You deserved it 647

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 021

You deserved it 14 604

mmedeiros14 0

Monday 11 April 2011 11:59

well look on the bright side i bet it was a good bj for him to remember the aniversary

Mirorbo 26

Monday 11 April 2011 12:34

*faceplam* Boys...please...for the sake of all us proper men...grow a brain and stop thinking with your junk!

Comments

SirSami 2

Tuesday 12 April 2011 6:14

didnt u give him a ******* the instant u first met him cause remembering ******* anniversary is sorta weird...

johnnie254 7

Tuesday 12 April 2011 6:28

the world revolves around our dicks! remember that!

Sk8er951 3

Tuesday 12 April 2011 7:03

me and you are prob the only guys in the world who think that. I've been with my girl for over a year now

abcd4242 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 8:01

wanna be my bestfriend? hahaha jk I've seen you call countless people your bestfriend on comments

tswiftbaby 15

Tuesday 12 April 2011 13:54

well, that's an important anniversary too! :)

HaloReachIsCool 6

Tuesday 12 April 2011 14:26

That... -takes off sunglasses- SUCKS :D

Gustavo311 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 19:06

he's a keeper :)

inslb54 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 20:45

awesome! epic win for you!!

christrex99 0

Wednesday 13 April 2011 2:13

No I still agree with 26

PHSYCHOnena 0

Wednesday 13 April 2011 3:35

break up time! Obviously your just there for sex...

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I learned that one of my friends is in love with me. How did I find out? A punch to the face from the boy she's supposed to be in a relationship with, for "coaxing her away" from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 833

You deserved it 246

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 109

You deserved it 16 242

Today, I found out that even though I suffer from insomnia most days, I can sleep within 5 minutes of studying Solid Mechanics, especially when I have an end term the next day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 385

You deserved it 877

Today, I'm catfishing a guy on Twitter. I didn't mean to start it, I had an account I used to vent with, and I used a pic with a cute girl. He sent me a DM saying he liked my pic. He wanted to talk on the phone, and we have fallen for each other. He thinks I'm 18. I'm a 39 year-old single mother of 3 kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 5 713

Today, I joined what I thought was my company’s morning meeting. It took 15 minutes of listening to strangers talk about organic farming before I realized I was in the wrong Zoom. I still don't know how the link I was sent got me there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 136

Today, after handing out several résumés for several jobs, I realized that I forgot to add my phone number to them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 215

You deserved it 31 904