By snortingspunk - 03/12/2015 12:52 - South Africa

Spicy
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 461
You deserved it 4 135
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Top comments

UnidentifiedFun 37

Upon reading this FML I think I cringed harder than I ever have in my entire life. Fyl

256 14

Comments

derangedplanet 23

cum on? seriously with the puns again...:)))

78 7
countryguy91290 16

Why is every one getting all spunky about it?

13 2
katachristic 19

Don't worry, it'll all blow over soon

12 1
derangedplanet 23

@80 how does that even work? do puns about girls sneezing cum on you turn you on? I've never really understood those jokes unless they're severely ironic.

0 4
joeyl2008 29

Yeah it is. I think I'm going to stop sucking dick.

10 47
Mathalamus 24

Agreed. Hence why I banned ******** for me in perpetuity.

5 31
Hammer1722 19

Just cause it happened to one person doesn't mean it will happen to you.

17 5
cheeology 22

Well, Atleast you had 1/7th of an ****** too?

97 12
Xion0014 20

I thought sneezing was 1/10th of an ****** xD

6 6
cheeology 22

Ugh I thought it was 1/6th... who knows anymore!

0 1
derangedplanet 23

You're probably right....this sounds like a horrifying experience. I can't imagine it would feel good...plus it probably wouldn't all come out...awgh that'd be awful. worse than sneezing ramen

86 4
DarkusOmegaX 14

How would you go about sneezing Ramen? It sounds like it hurts.

5 10
KK3137 31

You eat it and then sneeze while it's still in your mouth. It happened to me while eating spaghetti bolognese, the pasta and meat went up into (and partly out of) my nose.

26 1
Bloodmorphed 7

I sneezed out eggs before. was in a hurry to get to school so eating in the car. sneezed egg everywhere was funny as hell.

18 3
Xion0014 20

I once sneezed grains of rice out of my nose xD

8 2
PhinIt2WinIt 24

i hate rice in your nose .... but i once was drinking root beer that was fresh, but it fizzed up and went up and out my nose... also painful

2 1
najraa 19

You should try sneezing when you have to throw up.. It was a very long time ago but i remember it like it was yesterday. The horror.

10 1
oiler 21

I remember having a bloody mouth. then sneezing out blood. It was horrid

3 1
derangedplanet 23

I have done every subject in this list. but I have never sneezed semen. hahaha. but dear god did I not mean to start this but what a beauty.

6 1
Vegan_Cannibal 19

I've accidentally done every single one in this list. With rice, meat, while drinking something... Including the semen. It's not nice, I can assure you. But the worst part, undoubtedly, is feeling sticky inside your nose and be unable reach it and clean.

0 0
xTommytheGUNx 15

you joke was under appreciated you deserve more thumbs up

18 6
nonsensical 26

Could you tell where the snot ended and the cum began?

79 4
PePziNL 20

That is one of the most poetic sentences I've ever read.

5 1
UnidentifiedFun 37

Upon reading this FML I think I cringed harder than I ever have in my entire life. Fyl

256 14
Kielnmsoftly 26

Why? I mean yeah that'd suck but old memes burn worse.

0 4
shortcake18 15

At least now she nose

43 2