Today, my boss is being so cheap, he'd rather type in the dark, not fix our water heater or replace our cordless phone because he will not get his bonus if he goes over the budget. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss complained about how his performance bonus is too small, as he expected it to be the total amount accrued rather than a percentage. He also made the decision to not give any of the employees profit sharing this year, because the company didn't beat the budgeted increase in profits. FML
Today, my boss told me I’m doing too much overtime, and that it’s draining our budget. I never volunteer for overtime, I don’t need it. Every bit of overtime I do is shit he says I have to do to meet deadlines, most of which are just the parts of his job he can’t be bothered to learn how to do himself. FML
Today, while I was out of the office, I'd left my phone charging inside. My boss informed me that since I am clearly running up her electricity bill, it will be deducted out of my already nearly non existent paycheck. FML
Today, my boss confirmed he is a micro-managing asshole. We walked into the office together and I turned on the lights. He switched them off and switched them on again, just to make sure that I did it right. FML
Today, my boss scolded me for being too friendly to our customers and told me to back off and let them do their thing. Less than an hour after doing as he said, he scolded me again, this time for slacking off and not asking them if they needed help finding stuff. There goes my bonus. FML
Today, my boss called me while I was working from home to bitch me out over being away from my computer for 49 minutes, when my lunch break is only 45 minutes, thus wasting another 13 minutes. My boss is known for spending hours online gaming from home during work hours. FML
Today, my boss bragged to a coworker, in front of me, about how much money he saved on a project because he majorly underpays me. My boss is my dad. FML
Today, my boss decided that a mug and a public 'thank you' were a sufficient substitute for a Christmas bonus. FML
Today, my boss tried to fire me for not emailing him a screenshot to prove my email wasn't working. FML
Today, my boss finally worked out that by not giving the lads a pay rise to £18 an hour, instead just offering them overtime when necessary, it actually cost the equivalent of raising each employees salary to £26 an hour, for a whole year. He’s is blaming me because I issue the pay checks. FML
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Top comments
DahkLohd 4
Take your revenge by throwing some of that freezing cold water in his face. He won't be able to see who threw it in the dark, and he can't call for help. :)
4bidden 0
haha, thats pathetic....tell him you want some of his bonus money!!
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Comments (57)
Sparx1_1 16
That is why you contact HR and make a formal complaint.
iheartglasses 0
Cordless phones dont cost much. Although its not your responsibility to get one, if youre that set one "needing one" then buy one yourself...
Alleged_Cranium 7
Send an anonymous e-mail, from outside of the company, using a new e-mail account (that you will never use again) listing all of the issues, to as many of his bosses as you can. Never tell anyone.
Cinn_fml 23
There are illegal working conditions, not sure if your's are bad enough to have got there yet, I don't know a lot about it. Guess it depends if by 'water heater' you mean heating system or kettle. However, you might have a chance of getting things fixed if you bypass your boss and complain to people higher up, maybe showing them proof that you've complained and he's specifically said no. Especially seeing as these are things that have broken and therefore there should be a separate budget or whatever for things requiring repair.
GTmustang07 0
Your boss is terrible at his job if he can't manage the business' money better than this. not even enough money to pay for electricity..something isn't rihjt
coliesmalls 0
One word: OSHA
DocBastard 40
Technically, OSHA isn't a word, it's an acronym. So it would be more correct to say "Five words: OSHA." Yes, FIVE.
capnbzarr 43
From Merriam-Webster: "word : something that is said". That's the very first definition. All acronyms are words; not all words are acronyms.
DocBastard 40
Touche.
HomeAl0ne 20
And this is why bonuses are such a bad idea.
tykiej 0
I dont blame him. Money is tight.
javakrypt 0
Report him? Refuse to work? Sue? Perhaps learn your rights while you're at it?
Tsui 0
Wow, what a cheap ass. FYL and hope he gets in (legal) trouble.