Today, my best friend slapped me and called me a some colorful words before telling me that she never wanted to talk to me again because I supposedly slept with her boyfriend. Not only am I a virgin, but I'm a lesbian. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was approached by a girl who called me a slut for sleeping with her boyfriend, then punched me in the face. I'm a virgin. FML
Today, my best friend confessed to me that she's a lesbian. She quickly added, "Oh, don't worry, I don't like you. You're not attractive." FML
Today, my girlfriend slapped me and dumped me because she thought I was gay, simply because I had to miss a date because one of my guy friends was in a car accident, and I went to see him at the hospital. FML
Today, my best friend of 10 years told me she had slept with a man who had a girlfriend. I told her that it wasn't that bad. She then informed me that it was my boyfriend. FML
Today, my best friend called me a slut during an argument, and I couldn't stop myself from laughing. She lost her virginity at 13 years-old, and all four of her kids have a different dad. When I mentioned it, she gave me a black eye. FML
Today, I had the crap beaten out of me by a woman in the street, who accused me of sleeping with her husband. I still don't know who she or her husband are, and I'm still a virgin. FML
Today, as things were getting hot with my girlfriend, it came up that I'm a virgin. She broke up with me. FML
Today, my lesbian best friend told me she might be bi and wanted to try sex with a guy she trusts, AKA me. She eventually convinced me, but after we'd had 'weird best friend sex' she decided she’s a lesbian after all, and I “took advantage of her temporary confusion,” so we’re not friends anymore. WTF? FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for refusing to stop talking to my female best friend. When I pointed out that my friend's a lesbian, she said, "How the hell does that change anything?" I have no idea why I'm not happy to be rid of that paranoid imbecile. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams, unfortunately she called me by my ex-bestfriend's name. FML
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Top comments
lollipop217 0
obviously she's not really your best friend if she doesn't know you're a virgin or a lesbian
Lou_Briccant 0
How colourful were the words? Were they just shades of gray, or did she get real creative and start throwing in such colours as "magenta", or "sky blue"?
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Comments (143)
punk_rock9300 0
Hey baby email me i am to !
smurf_diddy_m 0
that suxs im a lesbian too. and tryin to tell ur best friend that ur a lesbian is hard to do. its not easy. so i feel ur pain email me
amkoverboard 0
dumb hoe, her not you.
knitbitch 0
Prove it to her you are lesbian. I don't know why she didn't know you're les, were you in the closet or did you not tell her b/c she's homophobic? Oh god how I HATE homophobes they are such a-holes. I'm straight and I don't see how being gay, lesbian, or bisexual is "shameful" according to this homophobe I know. Sorry for my rant. Best of luck in the telling her you didn't sleep with her bf department!
jjj_fml 0
First of all, I don't think she has to prove anything to her best friend. Coming from experience, it's not the easiest thing to bring up even if it is your best friend you are talking about. If she tells her best friend that she's a lesbian then I am guessing her BFF will believe her. I do agree.. You should tell her to clear things up.. it's a whole misunderstanding that should be resolved.
Naomi_fml 0
Oh sweetie I feel for you there. But really If you really want to throw her for a loop You might want to tell her the whole lesbian thing. Not like it will hurt much now that she doesn't want to talk to you. I mean really it's her fault for throwing the bloodie spaz attack in the first place.
hahaNO 0
that's some shitty friend
spockezri 0
@32, you can know that you are attracted to females even if you haven't had sex.
femi_love 0
yer best frens a douche.
1073kat 0
hahaha if you we're like.. an out lesbian it would be easier, hahaha.