Animals: Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught... - FML

By xXangelaXx - 21/08/2011 18:23 - United States

Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 225

You deserved it 6 091

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Same thing different taste

Meat is murder

By lanbon182 - 10/04/2009 05:11 - United States

Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML

I agree, your life sucks 251 766

You deserved it 31 278

RIP

By Anonymous - 18/11/2022 22:00 - Australia

Today, while I was staying at a farm for a few nights, I got really connected to a chicken I met. It was so tame and really cuddly. I legit loved it so much. Later on, we had chicken for dinner. It was the same chicken. He also had a name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 431

Out on the town

By Anonymous - 04/03/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, I was busy working on a paper, so my parents offered to go get me some Mexican food. Eager for some nachos, I thanked them. At 9 p.m. they weren't back, so I called. They weren't in an accident, but spontaneously buying a new car without telling me. They didn't return until 11 p.m. with cold, greasy KFC. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446

You deserved it 114

Urges

By Anonymous - 29/05/2021 04:01

Today, I accidentally bought chicken fingers. I couldn't even make it two days as a vegetarian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 935

By Anonymous - 05/02/2011 06:07 - United States

Today, I found out my dad ate my pet rabbit two years ago. He said he ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 344

You deserved it 4 175

Storage wars

By Will - 19/08/2021 08:02

Today, I went without my phone all day, because my roommate moved it. Because I'd left it in the fridge. On top of a bucket of KFC. Which he ate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 861

By samantha - 27/01/2010 14:05 - Singapore

Today, I was sick with the flu so my boyfriend announced that he would make me some chicken soup. It was touching until I stumbled to the kitchen and found out that his "chicken soup" was actually leftover KFC bones boiled in water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 736

You deserved it 4 364

By Loveless - 05/06/2011 12:23 - Canada

Today, I bought a dog to make me feel less lonely. He ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 512

You deserved it 8 200

By RIPJarJar - 20/10/2017 22:18

Today, my husband gave our three-year-old son a lesson on life and death. He did this by slaughtering our pet chicken for dinner in front of him. My son has been crying for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 607

You deserved it 488

By Anonymous - 24/11/2011 10:35 - United Kingdom

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 723

You deserved it 4 236

Next

Top comments

Porschephile 0

Monday 22 August 2011 1:39

Your dad has a sense of humor

BooGhosted 0

Monday 22 August 2011 1:42

Get fries.

Comments

Wheredidgrungego 12

Monday 22 August 2011 2:38

Daddy loves you!

Peonie_fml 6

Monday 22 August 2011 2:45

Whoops ignore double post e.e iPod crashed

Jmoney6802 0

Monday 22 August 2011 2:46

YDI for having a pet chicken

SuperSukh 6

Monday 22 August 2011 2:57

Wth? A chicken? YDI for having a CHICKEN as a pet!!!

babydoll8574 2

Monday 22 August 2011 3:06

The real question is, why do you have a pet chicken.....

Mirorbo 26

Monday 22 August 2011 3:10

People, there is nothing wrong with having a pet chicken. Like most birds, chickens are very fascinating creatures, and it's nice to have a hen around for a supply of eggs.

tieu2arock 3

Monday 22 August 2011 3:11

don't they crap around?

Mirorbo 26

Monday 22 August 2011 3:18

Don't ALL pets crap around?

disney_blonde 16

Monday 22 August 2011 3:13

Pet chicken? They are farm animals. YDI, get a real pet.

Mirorbo 26

Monday 22 August 2011 3:19

So you're saying I can't have a pet cow? 8C

danishbagel 3

Monday 22 August 2011 3:24

Who the hell has a pet chicken?

frosh2 9

Monday 22 August 2011 3:44

I do. :P it's common for rural small country towns.

crystalnight 19

Monday 22 August 2011 3:53

What defines pet? I had a pet alligator once.

anongrl 2

Monday 22 August 2011 3:57

I live in Tennessee, in a small rural town and have yet to meet someone that keeps a chicken for a pet.

anongrl 2

Monday 22 August 2011 3:59

I live in Tennessee, in a small rural town and have yet to meet someone that keeps a chicken for a pet.

Mirorbo 26

Monday 22 August 2011 4:34

It's a shame...they don't know what they're missing!

TeenageDirtbagg 3

Monday 22 August 2011 3:27

Haha !! Thats ****** up.

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The Top

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 083

You deserved it 18 230

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 624

You deserved it 34 713

The Top

Today, I was looking through old childhood pictures for my father's funeral and I found one of our old Christmas cards. I looked at it and noticed in the background our two dogs enjoying very spirited sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 328

You deserved it 196

Today, at work, I was talking to a customer. She kept shaking her head "no" at everything I said. I asked what she was disagreeing with. She told me she has Parkinson's Disease, teared up, and asked to speak to my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 630

You deserved it 7 509

Today, while at dinner with my current boyfriend, my ex walked in with his new girlfriend. The waiter put them at the table next to ours, and the two of them had a front row seat to me spilling an entire guacamole salad on my lap out of nervousness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 303

You deserved it 6 910

Today, I met my father for the first time since I was a baby. The first comment out of his mouth was, "I bet all the boys love those motherfucking bazongas, don't they?" Hi, Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 765

You deserved it 3 790

Today, I was approached by a policeman who asked me if I was the owner of the green Camry. Turns out my parents decided to teach me a lesson for lying where I had been by reporting the car stolen. They also wouldn't answer my one phone call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 007

You deserved it 9 087

Today, three weeks after a traumatic emergency cesarean section, my husband keeps sulking because sex is the literal last thing I want right now. The fact that my body is still sore and healing is apparently irrelevant when he is horny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 901

You deserved it 169