Today, my aunt brought me a birthday present. I quickly figured out that she'd simply returned the jacket I let her borrow two years ago for my brother's graduation party. It reeks of cigarette smoke and alcohol. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I returned a friend's jacket after borrowing it. I made sure to wash it and keep it clean. When he went to put it on, a pair of my granny panties fell out of the sleeve. FML
Today, my extended family came over for Christmas. I forgot to get a present for my extremely sensitive aunt. I took a gift from my re-gift pile and wrapped it quickly. Little did I remember that it was the same gift she gave me last year. She noticed. FML
Today, for my mom's birthday, I couldn't figure out what to get her, so I just took some of her jewelry, wrapped it up, and re-gifted it. She recognized it instantly. FML
Today, my mother scolded me for having a lighter in my room. My reason I had it? The candle that she bought me for my 25th birthday. I don't even live with her anymore, she showed up uninvited, and started going through my stuff. FML
Today, my cousin got married. I was cold so I went to get my jacket from my car. While leaving I saw my cousin walking around the front of the venue. I told her she looked beautiful in her dress. She looked up and said, "Where is my beer, have you seen my beer?" and threw up on me. FML
Today, I found out where a few of my favorite outfits went. My mother had taken them out of my closet, wrapped them, and given them to my cousin as a gift. FML
Today, I was relaxing on the couch after a long day with my annoying aunt when I heard my sister come in from the garage. I loudly asked, "Do you think Aunt Stacy knows everybody doesn't like her?" It wasn't my sister. It was my aunt returning my purse I had left in her car. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML
Today, I went to my son's friend's birthday party and felt really proud of giving a great gift. It just so happened that I regifted the same gift that his friend's mother gave to my son the month before, because I forgot to check the name on the bag. It looked like she was about to faint. FML
Today, my roommate gave me a self-help book on alcoholism for my birthday. He's an alcoholic. I gave him that book around 8 months ago. FML
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Top comments
KrazieKleo 13
Gift it back to her for Christmas!!
JustDerpin 11
That username.
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Comments (56)
calipilot227 16
Wash it, and then don't loan her anything again. Problem solved.
SoultheWolf 19
When I was given a jeans jacket by one of my friends who was a smoker and alcoholic, it took me years to get the smell out. I think I washed that thing about 80 times and let it sit in the closet for 6 years before the smell finally went away. So I can see why she would be so upset.
brokenhelix 4
Classy
aaghmylife 9
Look that bitch horse in the mouth.
Blurry_1 0
Neither a borrower nor a lender be. Instead, be the niece who calls her out on it at the next family get together. And send her the bill for getting it cleaned.
chosha_fml 27
I totally would have exclaimed loudly, 'oh, you finally returned my jacket! Thanks so much!'