By Anonymous - 08/08/2012 17:15 - United States - Chagrin Falls
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Wow it is brutal, i think u need to figure out fast if u are ready to put on with her for rest of your life Op!!Coz your really nice dinner(i believe) just went down the hole only coz of a virtually encoded wall, so called face-book wall... Wow interesting and #19 please get a real life... Thank u :)
Social expectations change with the times, and with technology, too. There is nothing wrong with her wanting a post on facebook, if that happens to be what's important to her. (Maybe for her the affirmation of their relationship in that venue counts more than spending money.) There is however lots wrong with giving an SO the silent treatment. That's immature and petty.
It's HER birthday, no? So, shouldn't you do what's important to her, what she wants, no matter how stupid you think it is? I bought my boyfriend a $250 game-used hockey stick for his birthday. To me, it was just a bloody expensive piece of wood, but it meant something to him, so I did it.
Communication is the problem here, in my opinion. OP didn't realize that the comment on the FB wall was so important to her b/c she didn't tell him. She probably dreamed of everyone seeing it & thinking how sweet he is & how much he loves her... but she never verbalized it. He probably didn't ask her, either, just did what he thought would best show her he loves her. Now she's being a baby about it & guy is baffled. Communication, people!
#102: Then if she were my girlfriend I'd ask for her to recompense all the money I spent on her: birthday dinner and extraneous gifts. Then I would login in to Facebook, and write "HAPPY BIRTHDAY." After all, according to you, all OP's girlfriend wanted was a Facebook post, since that's what's most meaningful to her. Do you see what I'm saying?
Or, for argument's sake, perhaps it is ALL important. The dinner, the time, and the Facebook post...? Why does it have to be either/or. It could be part of an all-inclusive package? I know that I'll do a dinner and a present and a Facebook post for my boyfriend's birthday (and for any of my friends and family, for that matter). I can see why the girlfriend might be upset, because she could have friends asking her why he didn't care enough to post.
bronsrawr: Have you considered that, as the boyfriend was so busy trying to please his girlfriend, he didn't even consider (or overlooked) posting something as trivial as a Facebook shout out? If her friends asked her, she could've replied "My boyfriend is busy spoiling me for my birthday. He probably forgot. No big deal." At least, that would be the mature thing to do. If the lack of a Facebook post is what upset her, then she needs to get her priorities straight.
#116: Or, for argument's sake, it's NOT all important. I hate it when people think they are entitled to everything they want. I don't scream because I don't have a birthday. I haven't had one since I was eighteen. Why? Because I don't want to put my family through all the rush and bustle of throwing me a party and buying gifts they can't afford. I say, let the girlfriend take what is given her, and be grateful.
116: what do you think couples did for birthdays before facebook? oh yeah...EXACTLY WHAT OP DID. I don't know about you, but I don't ever remember a couple walking into a room full of friends, having one significant other shout 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY <insert gooey-mushy message here>", and the other replying with something just as mushy. No. Why does it matter if her friends know if he said happy birthday? Why would he have to post it on an INTERNET site for her to be happy about her birthday? And why on earth would she give him the silent treatment over THAT when he was trying to make her birthday special? Hell, do you know how many people only say "Happy Birthday" on facebook because it shows up on their feed? I mean, sure, I could understand if it's important to her for her friends to see how much he cares about her, but he can do that without going through a social networking site. Personally, i think OP's girlfriend is just being petty and ungrateful. He did something personal and intimate for her, and she whines because he didn't post something for all the world to see. Real mature there. Especially if she never even communicated to him that it was that important.
Honestly, its almost expected that you do. With all the random friends you may or may not talk to who wish you a happy birthday on your wall, it'd be odd not to get one from the person closest in your life...I can't relate much though. On my birthday I didn't let my boyfriend take me out to dinner. But for every little event in our relationship or in my life, he makes sure to make a Facebook comment about it...
263- I'm a gamer too. I didn't mean to be snide. I just was saying that in no relationship should a Facebook post be more important than quality time with the other person, that's all. I wasn't trying to be rude. It just doesn't matter what someone thinks about your SO not posting on your Facebook wall.
275- I agree, time together is more important. It also could be taken badly though if you didn't write something. If I were to forget to write a post about my anniversary with my boyfriend, he might think I'm mad at him. Depending on whether or not OPs boyfriend is consistent with relationship and birthday posts with her will determine whether or not his girlfriend is a nutjob.
20, that is not harsh! Obviously OP and his GF are not the same maturity level, otherwise, he'd be having this conversation with her and not with the FML community and therefore, it is best that OP break up with her and find someone on his own maturity level.I have to admit that it is incredibly childish of her given that OP gave her a thoughtful and meaningful gift (dinner) instead of a dim-witted, half-apologetic, sorry I forgot your birthday and had to be reminded by FB kind of "Happy Birthday" post. but that's just my opinion though...
She needs to sort out her priorities...
Your girlfriend is a bit of a dick.