Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I went to the hospital emergency room to visit my boyfriend who had badly sliced his leg open. It ended with me being admitted with a possible head trauma, after hitting my head on the wall and floor as I collapsed at the sight of his wound. FML
Today, I broke my boyfriend's nose trying to pop his blackheads. His leg jerked in shock, kicked my leg, and I fell, breaking the mirror, cutting myself, and slamming into the bathroom sink. I woke up in the hospital, with over a hundred stitches, and my poor boyfriend in jail for suspected domestic abuse. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML
Today, I woke to find a pool of my own blood all over my pillow. Frantic to find the source of the blood, I rushed into the bathroom and tripped over my too-long pajama pants. Crashing to the floor face first, I broke my nose. Turns out I had just bitten my lip in the middle of the night. FML
Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut on his finger. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the couch and my boyfriend thought it would be cute to carry me to bed. He knocked my head on the door frame and I pretended it didn't hurt because he felt so bad, but I shouldn't have. I was rushed to the hospital hours later with a concussion. FML
Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML
Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
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Top comments
shibainu519 0
you should put fake gore on his d*** and see how much he likes it!
notsoluckypup 12
hope he pays for the hospital bill...
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Comments (141)
Mr_X100 1
wow fail
Tuesdays76 0
I dunno. it's all in peoples heads I guess. maybe he was just trying to help her get over her fear?
bryanorange 3
whats about blood dat gets people make them all pus-sy
MissBrainDamage 0
whaaaaaaaaaa?
Nimmrodel 11
you need to elaborate, or just type something that makes sense in the first place.
cptmorgan15 2
What about blood that gets people pussy? No, no that's not right. What about blood that makes people *******? Oh, I give up.
RedPillSucks 33
If blood got people pussy, there'd be a whole lot of bleeding people running around. "I'm bleeding. Where the bitches at?"
Ozark778 5
Bryanorange.... The same thing that has people running in fear... You're grammer..
huntermc7 0
hit him the nads when he's sleeping. that'll teach him
UnDerThEcaRpEt 0
that would make you a real douche, get your boyfriend to show you what a gas-pedal is hahaha
rowanzora 3
Douche.
herotime 7
I think your memory got messed up with the bang. the blood is really from hitting the counter. he actually pushed you into it.
ruben_A_ruiz 0
Lol my gf says shes scared of blood too. Ima try it out lol
JojoChuo 8
Damn it for wanting to try it out... but nice music taste.
briidontgive_ 0
Don't be shocked when she ends up like op
nickdunbar 8
owwww thats harsh
halogod69 0
gamer tag? before you give it to me, do you play halo reach?
FMLMaster2010 0
y is ur # on FML?!?!?!?!
anakaren_831 1
sucks to be you:p
DocBastard 40
The joke's truly on you - it wasn't fake.
theaws0m3guy 4
Oh the joy you bring me, Doc...
persianjr 15
Doc. I am fairly new to this site and this question might seem stupid to someone with more experience on here. but are you a moderator?
LoneStarTexan 6
Be vewy vewy careful :P
Grimmerie 31
doc, where the hell was that blade extracted from?!
DocBastard 40
I extracted it from a patient's back.
Nimmrodel 11
Thats brutal how long is it.
sgtrobswifey 0
Doc, are you legally allowed to show the pics you do on here? Are you not breaking a form if hippa when you show them? just curious..
RedPillSucks 33
I think you violate hippa if the stuff you share identifies the patient. But I'm neither a doctor nor a lawyer.
DocBastard 40
sgtrobswifey - it's a picture of a bloody knife blade. There's no identifying feature on it. Besides, HIPAA is only a problem in the US.
firewhip111 0
your going to feel that in the morning
LoneStarTexan 6
that's what I said to your mom last night lol jk
Randuhh_17 4
^^^^ Win....