Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to the hospital emergency room to visit my boyfriend who had badly sliced his leg open. It ended with me being admitted with a possible head trauma, after hitting my head on the wall and floor as I collapsed at the sight of his wound. FML
Today, I broke my boyfriend's nose trying to pop his blackheads. His leg jerked in shock, kicked my leg, and I fell, breaking the mirror, cutting myself, and slamming into the bathroom sink. I woke up in the hospital, with over a hundred stitches, and my poor boyfriend in jail for suspected domestic abuse. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML
Today, I woke to find a pool of my own blood all over my pillow. Frantic to find the source of the blood, I rushed into the bathroom and tripped over my too-long pajama pants. Crashing to the floor face first, I broke my nose. Turns out I had just bitten my lip in the middle of the night. FML
Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut on his finger. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the couch and my boyfriend thought it would be cute to carry me to bed. He knocked my head on the door frame and I pretended it didn't hurt because he felt so bad, but I shouldn't have. I was rushed to the hospital hours later with a concussion. FML
Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML
Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
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Top comments
shibainu519 0
you should put fake gore on his d*** and see how much he likes it!
notsoluckypup 12
hope he pays for the hospital bill...
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Comments (141)
iheartLA 10
is it bad that I think this would be a really funny joke to do on someone? April fools is coming up soon...
jacquelynmmm 0
haha
Peasanthunter_fml 0
Judging from your horrible grammar, you suffered brain damage.
boopipoo 1
you're and idiot dating an asshole
ripdat 0
dannngggg.
ponyboy4u 0
thats lame
fml_psl 0
yeah
fml_psl 0
thats true
Randuhh_17 4
So like, every month when you get your period, do you faint every time you change your pad?
Asstonia 1
who the **** wears pads?
UnDerThEcaRpEt 0
haha wow I would expect to see something like that in a spoof on tv!