Health: Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my... - FML

By Anonymous - 29/03/2011 23:58 - Canada

Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 963

You deserved it 3 991

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Same thing different taste

By Arielle - 31/01/2012 11:07 - Australia

Today, I went to the hospital emergency room to visit my boyfriend who had badly sliced his leg open. It ended with me being admitted with a possible head trauma, after hitting my head on the wall and floor as I collapsed at the sight of his wound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 627

You deserved it 4 407

That escalated quickly

By marrying this man - 10/10/2023 07:30

Today, I broke my boyfriend's nose trying to pop his blackheads. His leg jerked in shock, kicked my leg, and I fell, breaking the mirror, cutting myself, and slamming into the bathroom sink. I woke up in the hospital, with over a hundred stitches, and my poor boyfriend in jail for suspected domestic abuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 298

Romance isn't dead

By broken - 13/09/2009 04:26 - United States

Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 012

You deserved it 4 481

By N O - 27/05/2014 18:47 - Canada - Granton

Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 400

You deserved it 6 970

Panic!

By Bleach dat Blood - 20/07/2015 03:02

Today, I woke to find a pool of my own blood all over my pillow. Frantic to find the source of the blood, I rushed into the bathroom and tripped over my too-long pajama pants. Crashing to the floor face first, I broke my nose. Turns out I had just bitten my lip in the middle of the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 133

You deserved it 3 819

By tessisue - 04/01/2016 11:18 - Germany

Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut in his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 893

You deserved it 2 229

By Anonymous - 11/01/2018 19:00

Today, I fell asleep on the couch and my boyfriend thought it would be cute to carry me to bed. He knocked my head on the door frame and I pretended it didn't hurt because he felt so bad, but I shouldn't have. I was rushed to the hospital hours later with a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 954

You deserved it 682

By Anonymous - 19/10/2014 01:23 - United States - South Salem

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 306

You deserved it 4 148

Thrashed

By Ringo McDingo - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 556

You deserved it 2 268

By Username - 22/02/2010 05:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 119

You deserved it 3 327

Next

Top comments

shibainu519 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 6:07

you should put fake gore on his d*** and see how much he likes it!

notsoluckypup 12

Wednesday 30 March 2011 6:08

hope he pays for the hospital bill...

Comments

iheartLA 10

Wednesday 30 March 2011 8:14

is it bad that I think this would be a really funny joke to do on someone? April fools is coming up soon...

jacquelynmmm 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 8:20

haha

Peasanthunter_fml 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 8:23

Judging from your horrible grammar, you suffered brain damage.

boopipoo 1

Wednesday 30 March 2011 9:04

you're and idiot dating an asshole

ripdat 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 10:19

dannngggg.

ponyboy4u 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 10:42

thats lame

fml_psl 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 11:00

yeah

fml_psl 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 11:10

thats true

Randuhh_17 4

Wednesday 30 March 2011 11:37

So like, every month when you get your period, do you faint every time you change your pad?

Asstonia 1

Friday 29 April 2011 0:15

who the **** wears pads?

UnDerThEcaRpEt 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 12:20

haha wow I would expect to see something like that in a spoof on tv!

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Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 014

You deserved it 28 799

Today, I discovered that all the times my boyfriend says he's in the bathroom with horrible diarrhea, he's actually sitting there smoking crack and talking to other women. I've dedicated everything in my life to him. I feel so brokenhearted and defeated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 730

You deserved it 174

Today, stressed to the point of breakdown over my impending daughter's birth, I went to a small church. After a long talk with the pastor, I finally began to feel some calm and peace. Too bad my wife flipped out, accused me of wanting to make her a "handmaid" and made me sleep on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 461

You deserved it 173

Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 093

You deserved it 7 537

Today, my penis isn't so small that I pee on my balls. It's so small that it fits between the toilet and toilet seat, causing me to pee all over the floor full stream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 134

Today, my mom decided to clean out my freezer. She freaked out over a box of unbelievably expensive King crab legs that expired over five years ago. My PTSD kicked in and I explained that I got them for a special occasion three days before my girlfriend was diagnosed with lung cancer. I never got that special occasion. I hate me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 142